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Mondays and Fridays

ED:  Hey, remember when this was a comic about superheroes?  It's about time we got back to the heroes and villains battling it out over ... something.  Not important, just so long as there's lots of violence.

Anyone else remember the old Marvel mini-series "Damage Control"?  It showcased the adventures of the company that comes in and cleans up after the supers demolish the town.  Now THAT would be a great idea for the next summer blockbuster.

ERIK: I can't count the number of times the Power Rangers demolished Angel Grove but were still celebrated as the world's greatest heroes one scene later.

95 comments:
Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Just a broken window? No shattered buildings or anything? Huh, collateral damage was surprisingly low. (Although I doubt anyone's complaining; less wasted money, less mess for Mr. Mighty.)

Oh, and that robot was not designed well. No protective coating for the mad scientist within! What's stopping him from falling out? Instead, buy from Killer Robots 'R Us today and get a safer robot for 10% less! Call now, 1-800-AI KILLS! That's right, 1-800-AI-KILLS! For a limited time only!

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Y'know, one would think that with all the stuff he's stolen, he'd be able to pay even if the cable company charged outrageous amounts... odd. Then again, maybe it just all got confiscated before he could sell it on the black market or something.

Wayne (wayne) says:

We just bought a hi-def TiVo Series 4, and we only have basic cable and a 15+ year old Panasonic TV.  The awesome thing is that I can download 450 hours of low-def programming, which looks just fine on our TV, but we don't get premium programming, so an awful lot of it is movies from TCM.

And I totally agree: as Bruce Springsteen said, 57 channels and nothing's on.  And 57 channels?!  What a loser.

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Heh.
Pastangum Felinix (pastangum) says:

Joseph, he just got released from prison thanks to the efforts of an (evil) attorney. I imagine he wouldn't stiff the lawyer either... ESPECIALLY if it's the same Kelly girl who's currently visiting another plane of existence, in her own canon. She's scary.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Okay, forget the mad scientist, the explosion-happy wife is who I'm worried about now.

...although, on the other hand, explosive lawn ornaments would do wonders for keeping salesmen away...

Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says:

Even more fun are Tannerite-filled lawn gnomes.

Pastangum Felinix (pastangum) says:

http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2012-01-15

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

What, no Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking? Silly Hornswoggle, you'll never get by as a villain just by hitting, breaking, and stealing stuff! The small appliance repair might pay your bills okay, though...

Anyway, I like the meeting here, where (for once) the heroes are attempting to anticipate the villains' next move rather than just sitting around waiting for it. Its a lot more proactive and to be honest makes more sense than most superheroes these days. Brava, sir!

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Unauthorized access only? First that made me laugh, then I wondered... wouldn't that let the superheroes in, since they are also unauthorized?

Also, it's a good thing the facility is secret, because otherwise people might get a bit suspicious of MWAHAHAHAHAHA... mostly because it fits the bill of supervillains so well. As I said, good thing it's secret, because now I can chuckle instead of wonder why the citizens are so oblivious. :D

The Auld Grump (theauldgrump) says:

Best to begin with an abandoned missile base - http://www.missilebases.com/properties prices have dropped since Villain Source went live! A mere $750,000 gets you a very nice place indeed.

Chris Bacon (necroskippy) says:

How hideous must it be for Hornswoggle not to qualify?  We must be talking Lovecraftian levels of  uglitude.  It's probably Roseanne Barr.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

...does that means they have Cthulhu locked up in there???

...now I'm gonna have nightmares anyway. XD

gwen patton (ardrhi) says:

Millie Bornes? Don't tell me...parents were inordinately fond of french card games?

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

Actually, she's just very fond of driving like crazy.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

"Dude, have you thought about finding a different job?"

...this from an official Henchman. Not very bright, our Hornswoggle. Then again, that's why we love him: for his complete obliviousness. :D

E.T. the Eccentric Type (et_the_eccentric_type) says:

I'm guessing he unlocked the "Mean-Grow Gene"?

And he's a geneticist?

Yeah, I'm stumped.

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

Yes, he does splice genes and grow mean things.  There was also an American football player named "Mean Joe Green".

Charlotte Leese (charlotteml) says:

I almost said his surname was an anagram of genome, then I noticed the R and felt silly. (You could say as a geneticist that he could be celled a "genomer")

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Are Dr. Unpleasant, Hornswoggle, and Doc Tormentor the only non-punny names here? They're gonna stand out a bit. Still, love the puns, especially the stealthier ones. "The Mouse" was particularly clever.

In terms of Doc Tormentor, though... talk about Names to Run Away from Really Fast! Wouldn't want to be in his clutches. At least with Unpleasant I could probably get away while he monologued...

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

They are punny names, just a bit less obvious.  For example, Dr. Unpleasant's first name is Dooley.  He came from a family of villains, so he went into crime out of a sense of duty (he's "duly" unpleasant).

As for the others, "All will be revealed at the proper time".

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Ah, so they're even stealthier puns! Nice!

Pastangum Felinix (pastangum) says:

Sounds like "Mouse" doesn't offer voice capabilities; he just wants a keyboard to work with.

Hornswoggle got hornswoggled, but he could take lessons from his new leader, doctor, mentor. (And yes, that IS a worrisome name.  "Excellent..." choice, Ed!)

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Nah, you'd need Pinkie Pie for surprise parties. Since these are metahumans, the surprise will likely be measured in thousands of dollars in repair costs. XD

Mark Chapman (aardvark86) says:

I find it a little disconcerting that Mr Mighty has the same evil leer as the supervillain.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Personally, I think the real punchline's in the first panel: "Yes, villains can be so inconsiderate." Do villains always wait for you to be ready where you come from, Mr. Museum Director? Silly person.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Not just the monster-fist-sized hole, but also the Mr. Mighty's head-sized hole in the ceiling.

E.T. the Eccentric Type (et_the_eccentric_type) says:

... and a Mighty-head-sized hole.

Hopefully, though, the works of art recovered will be worth slightly more than the damage caused to the museum! A net gain for out heroes!

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

...it took me a moment to get that pun... and then I did... and then my head asploded... why is Gromene trying to use plants to commit crimes when he has horrible puns like those?

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Ouch. That had to hurt.

Personally, I think the villains have won this round. It's two heroes against three villains, and the villains appear competent enough to have Hornswoggle keep Mr. Mighty busy while either Unpleasant or Gene keeps G-Nat busy. The other one can then grab stuff and leave before either of his teammates are overcome.

Of course, that's entirely dependant on whether Mr. Mighty has some battle-related epiphany that would completely turn the tides. If he does, it's all up in the air again.

Oh, also, Happy Independence Day!

E.T. the Eccentric Type (et_the_eccentric_type) says:

Hornswoggle'd!

PS: Yeeeeaaaah!

Jacen Carpenter (jacen) says:

Love the design of Hornswoggle...but I've always been a sucker for horny monsters!

 

Brian Bogue (brianbogue) says:

There are more villians, and as they figured the heros would be waiting here at the most logical place for an attack, I suspect the rest of the villians would be attacking at the storage closet with the really good lock.  of course that is where the rest of the heros are.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Wow, Gene says weird things when his brain is scrambled.

Tides have turned now; I hadn't realized Hornswoggle was stuck, which makes all the difference, especially with Gene trying to drink concrete. On the other hand, it's not too late for a villain turnaround either.

Jennifer McGaffey (jjmcgaffey) says:

I hadn't realized Dolly's sonic scream was that focused. Took out the one and didn't even dent the other (and presumably didn't hit MM either).

Pastangum Felinix (pastangum) says:

It frustrated me when I couldn't find Gene's phrase anywhere; I was certain I'd read it before. Here's the reason for my deja vu...

http://www.webcomicsnation.com/eddurd/everydayheroes/series.php?view=single&ID=167865

Pastangum "how'd I remember that?" Felinix

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

Good job, P.F.!  One more time, and it'll be an official Running Gag ...

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Ah, shoot, psycho lady on evil motorbike alert! I have to say, though, that's a cool bike. I want one! What fun we would have together, impaling all those who dare get in my way! Muahahahaha! >:D

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Okay, now I feel like actually making a bishop who feeds people concrete! XD

Drat, the heroes are winning. I usually root for the villain, though, so take what I say with a grain of salt. Or a buttered piano.

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: He got his help— in the end! The rear end!
Chris Bacon (necroskippy) says:

You just have to create a character called The Concrete Bishop!  Good guy, bad guy, don't care.

Pastangum Felinix (pastangum) says:

Joseph, that's easy.  Go visit Bishop's Pub, and order their house special, the Pint o' Concrete.  It's a real knockout.

Pastangum 'gives you a stiff upper lip' Felinix

Niek Deurloo (ardawen) says:

gosh I wouder how he would have to get flue shots (that is if he ever needed any) 

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

He doesn't need them ... hasn't had a sick day since he was eleven years old (just before his powers starting coming in).

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Hmm, that might be a problem if he ever gets sick with something that can affect him but that doesn't remove his invulnerability...

Mark Chapman (aardvark86) says:

She did rather set him up for the line, though.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Actually, even though Mr. Mighty shoehorned the line in, I actually found that "bust" joke to be pretty funny! I just think he uses it too much. XD

Also, apparently concrete is alcoholic now. o.O

Pastangum Felinix (pastangum) says:

So THAT's what the bust is made of! I'd have expected concrete to have a more greyish cast to it. And it looks larger than a pint; that's a pretty hefty, well-rounded bust. Certainly not just two cups.

Pastangum "always bink responsibly" Felinix

gwen patton (ardrhi) says:

Is that Michael Jackson, during his blue period?

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

You know, when I first saw this page, I asked Erik about the bust: 

"I based it on 2 things actually; in the second game of the Phoenix Wright series (Justice For All), a particular bust becomes a key piece of evidence.  The general setup of the bust is based on it (like where exactly it cuts off and the hat is sort of similar).  But the hair, gem and collar come from a My Little Pony character (Trixie).  I know we have at least one fan who follows the comic so I figured I'd do a subtle shoutout."

Brian Bogue (bigbearseviltwin) says:

What has he found?  Could it be the storage closet with the really good lock?

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Yay, a break for the villains! Go Hornswoggle, I knew you could do something useful!

...useful to the villains, I mean.

Ben Schweitzer (dracone) says:

The broken door piece says Currator, which means it'sthe museum curator's office. Just what are these wingnuts after?

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Nah, obviously some supervillain stole the Mona Lisa already and replaced it with a cheap copy which is now the one with eyebrows. That hair is far too blond to be the real Mona's.

On another note, what the heck is a Hyperframmination Ray supposed to do, Unpleasant? Don't you know that you're supposed to name your weapons so that people can tell how they work from the name? Because if you don't do that, that takes the fun out of telling the hero anyway! XD

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

The frammiton is a sub-atomic particle named for its discoverer, the Norwegian mad scientist Dag Frammit.  It opposes the weak nuclear force and breaks down molecular bonds, causing matter to disintegrate.  Dr. Unpleasant's invention raises the frammitons to a high-energy state (hence the "hyper" in hyperframmiton) and focuses them into a beam.

There!  You daily dose of pseudoscience has been delivered.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

...that is quite possibly one of the most frightening weapons I've ever heard of. THank you for stealing my sleep. O.O

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: At least they're leaving $3.77.
Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

That's one sarcastic computer...

Brian McCloud (mauvecloud) says: Wait, doesn't he need to enter a destination account number for a transfer?
E.T. the Eccentric Type (et_the_eccentric_type) says:

"Two Bucks?! That's outrageous!

"I'm supposed to be robbing you!"

David W (dww) says:

Good greif, I haven't seen menus like that since about 1985.  Still, it is a museum...

Also wondering how the bad guys found out the three authorisation codes.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

@Ed: Nope, I didn't know that. Not at all. I'll have to add that to my Handbook of Not Messing Up Villainous Plans.

@Erik: If nothing else, I'll give you one. You can taste-test my new spinach-and-rhubarb cookie recipe! XD

So I suppose you could say G-Nat was bugging Dr. Unpleasant? ...yes, I am a horrible punster. Punbelievable, in fact.

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

@Joseph:  It's already in the handbook.  Check out the Evil Overlord List (http://eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html), item #86.

David Harmon (mental_mouse) says: Erik, well, they did swap in those "Captain Ersatz" paintings... I assume the museum staff have this down to a routine by now. I mean really, between common art thieves, evil sorcerers trying to get hold of ancient relics, aliens wanting back the mask Great-Grandpa loaned Tutankhamen, and who knows what all....
Vlad Long (mrttao) says:

Hitting people on the head hard enough to knock them out could very well cause permanent brain damage or even hemorraging that results in death.

This is really inappropriate of a hero to do.

Brian Bogue (bigbearseviltwin) says:

Vancover Washington or Vancover BC?

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

The Canadian one.  That's where Erik's from, but don't hold it against him.

Brian Bogue (bigbearseviltwin) says:

I know you are busy, but I like your art work better

Brian Bogue (bigbearseviltwin) says:

you know, I have never been able to get any of those links to work for me

 

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

@Brian:  Which links?  The voting buttons?  Email me at eagedeon@yahoo.com and let me know what you're trying to do, and what error messages you get.

Sam Schmern (the_occupant) says:

 It's all about the nerves. Considering that he IS a father, he almost certainly has working nerves in his mini Mister Mighty.

Brian Bogue (bigbearseviltwin) says:

Thank you Ed for sending my the correct link to your comic,  For years I have had problems with your links in the commentary and now I can use any of them!  I have no idea how I got that bad book mark.

Jennifer McGaffey (jjmcgaffey) says:

I did see the black eye, though I wouldn't have caught the sign if you hadn't mentioned it.

Pastangum Felinix (pastangum) says:

Same here, Jennifer.  Saw the black eye, missed the Mother's sign.  And now that I look again, exactly one of the paintings is completely unscathed.  ;)

Brian McCloud (mauvecloud) says:

Am I the only one who noticed that the date selector range is messed up? I don't see much point in being able to select back to 1980 when the first webcomic entry was apparently May 12th, 2007, and even though it's now well into 2012, the date selector only goes up to 2010.

Wayne (wayne) says:

I remember the first baseball game that I attended at Bank One Ballpark, the original name of the Arizona Diamondbacks stadium.  Old friend of mine's wife had them, we spent pretty much the entire game talking and catching up as we hadn't seen each other in pretty much a decade, and that game had some thing like 3-4 grand slams.

The architecture at that park is also pretty cool.

And we didn't get his by the hurricane, but we did have lightning strike a tree behind our house 9 days ago and blow a 25' fragment through our roof.

Sam Schmern (the_occupant) says:

We Canucks (AKA Canadians) also celebrate Labour Day.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Clever, Team Evil! Very clever! I applaud your masterfully executed plan!

...of course, the only flaw in it is that they should have made absolute sure Hornswoggle wasn't going to talk. Send him to Hawaii or something while the heroes are occupied with something else.

gwen patton (ardrhi) says:

Argh...those things are a pain to use. That many debit cards, he'll be biting the heads off cashiers before he gets through the fourth card.

How...EVIL.

Ralf Corsten (gerbilcomics) says:

I think his new assignment is to organize M.W.A.H.A.H.A.H.A.H.A.'s annual picknick.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

...Tormentor's making Unpleasant do his taxes?! The fiend!

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

Can't be taxes; in comic time, it's late October.  And the annual picnic is a summer event.  Keep guessing!

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

...maybe he's making him do last year's taxes even though they're already paid? That makes it even worse, actually, knowing that it's completely inconsequential but that you're gonna get hurt if they're wrong...

Note that this is no longer my real theory, I'm just looking for excuses to prolong it. XD

Ralf Corsten (gerbilcomics) says:

...they're going to steal candy from babies, aren't they? Trick or Treat, late October? Aw, I don't know.

Joseph Rasche (thewarriorofmanyfaces) says:

Hornswoggle's getting character development? What a tweest!

Ralf Corsten (gerbilcomics) says:

So, is this comic still set in 2006 or 2007? Or is it now just fall in a deliberately unspecified year?

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

It's October of ... some year close to the present.  I had a couple of minor plot devices that need to be changed due to real-life events. 

Pastangum Felinix (pastangum) says:

Been there, patched that, Ed.  (I've also been on the other side, as the one who left and had a less-experienced person take my place.

I went back for a visit some months later, and my 'replacement' was stuck trying to make sense of a slew of errors in a module which had worked fine.  I took a look at the errors, knew what they meant, and showed her where she had forgotten to close a loop.  That's probably how urban stories of 'the supergenius hacker' get started...

Pastangum ")" Felinix

E.T. the Eccentric Type (et_the_eccentric_type) says:

I wonder what the rest of the family looks like?

Were they equally inspired by Maurice Sendak?

Ralf Corsten (gerbilcomics) says:

I've been following EH for a year or so now, and I just wanted to comment that this comic motivated me to make my own. It's here on WCN as well. (The Misadventures of Gerbil) Bravo, man! You've shown me how good an amateur one-man-webcomic can be! Keep 'em rolling! (And eh... I kinda stole the concept of a teenage superhero from your comic.)

Sam Schmern (the_occupant) says:

So is he an alien or some kind of Earth criter That Science Forgot?

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

Hornswoggle's origin (and the rest of his family) will be revealed eventually.

John Campbell (jcampbel) says:

My ...favorite present from a predecessor was about 120kB of completely uncommented Perl of the "There's More Than One Way To Do It, So We Should Use The Most Opaque And Obscure Way Available" school of Perl coding. It looked like someone had puked up a half-digested sendmail.cf. The guy apparently didn't understand how to include external libraries in Perl, either... there was one massive block of code that was inlined in at least three different places. And not a single comment to help illuminate what sort of delusions were passing through his brain when he wrote the thing. I diagnosed it more by watching its data files and seeing what happened when I poked it than by trying to unravel the knot of its code.

And I ultimately used the Gordian solution... just tossed the whole mess and wrote a replacement from scratch. Mine was fully commented, a lot more clearly written, and about a third the size, even with the comments and the more verbose coding style. And it cut out about three stages of the process that served no real purpose and had previously required manual intervention, including (I kid you not) a bit where the data was packaged up and FTPed to my predecessor's new company to be processed and returned. (I was working for public television, and it was our broadcast schedule to be posted on our website, so it's not like this was confidential information or anything. But still. What. The. Hell.)

Nyerguds (nyerguds) says:

ERIK: "I hope you brought a magazine or something, Hornswoggle. I think you'll be there for a while."

 

Hornswoggle : "I have, but I CAN'T TURN THE PAGES!" :(

Matthew Mayabb (sephikus) says:

@Joseph I'd assume they'd simply have a reverse access system. Which means everyone by default is authorized, thus locking them out, and anyone they actually want in is revoked authorization, thus letting them in.

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Ed Gedeon ||    External Homepage · 

I'm a middle-aged computer programmer from Indiana, but I've always enjoyed doodling and drawing. After discovering webcomics recently, I decide to try my hand at creating one. My wife thinks I'm crazy. My wife is a very sensible woman. ... full profile