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Smithson Thus Far... ·

Joe Charneskie (mutant-sentry) says:

...who did call?  Is this what the MIB do in their off hours, spy on talking dogs?



Rob (rrreed) says: Now I'm curious about Unity's remaining 5%. Nanobots? Strange alchemical brews? A (nonspecific unique item of great value) enchanted with (one or more of a variety of magical spells that preserve dead flesh, animate the inanimate, create a simulacrum of intellience, and/or return life to the dead)? A few gazillion coulombs worth of electrons? Vita-ray irradiated super-soldier serum? An Adamantium™ skeleton? Spam instead of blood?
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

Well, the cast page does say, "unknown classified non-blood substance", so I'm assuming that's the other 5%.  And I second Rob's idea that Spam is involved somehow.  Plus a few gazillion (or even kajillion) coulombs.

Now I have this mental image of Shaenon, perched atop a castle tower, surrounded by lighting-collection equipment, with her hair standing out in all directions from static electric charges, standing over a motionless figure on a slab, arms raised and screaming to the heavens, "Undeath!  UNDEATH, do you hear me!!  GIIIVE MYYY CREATION ... UUUNNNDEEAAAATH!!!"

(...and another page goes onto the fan art backlog...)


Robin Paulus (bubble181) says: I'd say it's sowing thread, but that might be too mundane o_O 
Petsky Piyamaradu (peropi) says: Your "percent" sign is backwards.  :P
Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says:

These bears are getting dangerously close to opening a can of Zombie whoopass on themselves.

Ed - Shaenon's mad self-portrait from yesterday's Narbonic would make a great start for Zombie-Animating Mad Shaenon. 

Aaron Shades (prof_tinker) says: - Five percent thread, wire, nuts, bolts, bullets no one bothered to remove, and air bubbles.
Rob (rrreed) says: "Spam! SPAM, do you hear me!! GIIIVE MYYY CREATION … SSSPPPAAAMMM!!!"
Edwin Quantrall (reynard) says: *Insert obligatory Monty Python-esque "SPAM" sing-along chorus here*
Basil Jelly (basil_jelly) says: Two percent is nylon thread I think.
Rachel (admiralshazbot) says: My bet for the 5% is jagermonster DNA.
Shaenon Garrity (shaenongarrity) says: Jeffrey had it in the script as "100% Genuine Ex-Human Product," but I thought that was too optimistic.

I always write slashes and percent signs backward. Maybe it's because I'm left-handed, I dunno.
Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says: The more I read what the bears say, the more they sound like the self-important, irrational twerps that work in EEO offices.
Brian Rogers (billionsix) says: I gotta say, I'm really starting to like Unity. She's smarter than she lets on, I think. At least when she manages to focus on something. But the attention span thing is probably just a side effect of using glued-together parts of 4 or 5 different brains.
Rob (rrreed) says: Perhaps Unity is smarter than she lets on to herself as a result? That seemingly short attention span could be the result of being frequently surprised by her own actions.
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: ......
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says: I love the phrase "hassle sammich".  A combination of modern attitude and classic Li'l Abner.  My Capp's off to you!
Andrew W (mrandrew) says:

Isn't it Tip's job to most nights be the killer drag?

Rob (rrreed) says: No, I think it's to be killer in drag.
Dave Van Domelen (dvandom) says: Purebreds always get the most bizarre names....
Michael Brewer (wusemajor) says:

I wonder if Artie is involved with this group?  I rather doubt he would be this anal about rampages, concidering everthing he has done.

Also, I'm trying to decide if getting Tip involved as a moderator would help or hurt the situation. 

Rob (rrreed) says: Given Tip's record to date, I'd say that the answer is definitely, "yes".
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Heh heh.
Incog Neato (ghede) says: Hmm. Technically Sweetheart is a new breed, so I guess she could qualify as a purebred. Then again, considering her transgenic nature, she could also qualify as the ultimate mongrel.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

I wandered with a kick-ass crowd
That marches on thru suburb streets.
We passed a store; I cried aloud,
'Let's get some Little Debbie treats!'
I took three boxes, just because
My rampage needs a sugar buzz.

(With many many apologies to Wordsworth)


Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says: I like the notion that Unity's a crowd.
Aaron Shades (prof_tinker) says: I think even Arty would consider these guys too anal. Besides, considering the slightest slip a horrific backlash against the community dosn't help anything.
Shaenon Garrity (shaenongarrity) says: A slight slip? That coffee went everywhere!
Rob (rrreed) says:

Regarding Tiff's comment: it's not schizophrenia if you really are hearing other voices in your head! If they can't agree to follow parliamentary procedure, then you have a problem.

Me, I have this guy representing the lower left anterior basal ganglia who always filibusters whenever a vote on kumquats arises. And I don't even like kumquats!

Edwin Quantrall (reynard) says: Rob Reed says:

(...) it's not schizophrenia if you really are hearing other voices in your head! If they can't agree to follow parliamentary procedure, then you have a problem.


That quote is Epic Awesome! Definitely T-shirtable! 

Dave Van Domelen (dvandom) says: NEVER say "Bite me!" to Unity.
Rob (rrreed) says: I've always found that while patchouli is excellent with most campers, lemon grass is better for Winnebagos.
Adam Underfoot (unnatural20) says:

I absolutely hate getting arm hair stuck in my teeth.

And hippies of both gender tend to be hairy. 

John Campbell (jcampbel) says:

If I were Maya, I'd be more annoyed by Unity's use of speciesist epithets like the T-word than her suggestion that there might be some appeal to chowing down on some nice, juicy, helpless campers.

I'm with Maya on the hippies, though. 

Adam Underfoot (unnatural20) says:

...then again, they are hippies, so that should probably have been

"And hippies of all genders tend to be hairy."

K C (spotweld) says: It's not the patchouli that would make them so flavorful.. it's the "orgeano" ...  if you know what I mean.
Michael Brewer (wusemajor) says: I think Sweetheart has regained the moral high ground here, given what her rampage consisted of and what the Bear's rampage will likely consist of.
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Too much information.
Pete Bleackley (petethemadscientist) says: Going along with the classic children's literature theme, I'd like to suggest that these are Bears of very little brain.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

Both Monty Python and the webcomic Subnormality have commented on the tastiness of Jehovah's Witnesses.

(sorry, I forgot how to embed a link)

Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says: It seems the bear never learned the trick of scrubbing hippies with rocks to clean them off faster.
Elaine Corvidae (elaine_corvidae) says: Hey now, I shave at least once a week. And so does my husband; I'll leave it to you to decide if I mean his face. ;-)
Dave Van Domelen (dvandom) says: She embodies the government pretty thoroughly, in fact.
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Heh heh heh.
K C (spotweld) says: When did Unity meet Regan?
James Rice (jhrice) says:

I think Tip would have handled this whole situation differently, but if it reached this point, I could hear him deliver that exact same line.


Rob (rrreed) says: Your tax dollars at work, ladies and gentlemen.

And now, if you'll pardon me, there's an Army study I need to peruse…
Andre Richard (andre) says: Now there's a girl who loves her dog. Or is manipulating her for use in future acts of horror....
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

OK, picture this ... the California State Legislature is in heated debate ... tempers are flaring, vital legislation is on the verge of defeat ... then Governor Schwarzenegger comes charging in and getting all Terminator on the opposition (the good Terminator, obviously) ... and when a panicked lawmaker screams "why are you doing this??!" ...  Arnold smiles, looks them in the eye and says ...

Come on, you can totally picture it now!  Work with me here!

Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says: Ooo! Ooo!! Last panel on a T-shirt, please!!!
C. R. (crazybelgium) says: Heh, scariest phrase in the world: "I'm from the government and I'm here to save you."
Edwin Quantrall (reynard) says:

"(...)I'm the government, beyatch."


Well, it's better than being the government beyatch... 

Joe Charneskie (mutant-sentry) says: I think Unity might have bits of Regan in her...depends when she was stiched up really...
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

"De gubernaculo venimus, et adservirevos volumis."

(Quid quid latine dictum sit, altum viditur.)

Adam Underfoot (unnatural20) says: Well, if we take into account the ease of resurrecting Reagan in, say, Shortpacked!, I don't doubt that it's rather simple here in Skin Horse.
Dave Van Domelen (dvandom) says: It started slow, then katamari'ed.
Joe Charneskie (mutant-sentry) says:

...G*D D*mm*t!  Now I'm gonna have that theme song stuck in my head all day...

Indigo C (indigo) says: Trust Unity to not waste a good aftermath.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says: Twenty bucks on Unity!
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says: That wasn't a gambling bet, I'm saying that Unity could handle twenty male deer/human hybrids and whup their little white-tailed butts.
Rob (rrreed) says:

The dead don't need to respect the living—the numbers are on their side.

Aaron Shades (prof_tinker) says: Black and white vrs. Black and white! The two-toned titans clash this sunday, at a pound near YOU!!
Mud Mudd (ceramic) says:

That's mortalism, that is. No respect for the dead these days, these little brats. Why, in my day...

Of course, in those days they buried still-living servants with their dead masters, so by right the dead should be willing to let us have a turn now.

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The education bestowed on Shaenon K. Garrity by her parents had been expensive, athletic and prolonged. ... full profile