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Smithson Thus Far... ·

Alix Tierney (almaseti) says: So. Cute. I want a puppy!Sweetheart.
EvilMid nightLurker (emlurker) says:


So Bram didn't want to rule the USA himself?  That shows an unusual degree of forethought in a mad scientist.  Although expecting a gengineered puppy to do so shows some of their more usual habits of thought. :)

And she had a crush on Buddy!  Awwwww..... ^.^

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Awwwww. I love panel 3, with Bram scruffling Sweetheart's ears...
Pete Bleackley (petethemadscientist) says:

Saturday's comic reminded me of a Bob Monkhouse line.

When I said I wanted to be a comedian, everybody laughed.
Well, they're not laughing now!

Nate Cull (natecull) says:


(Tune and most of the words: "America" , Simon and Garfunkel)

"Let us be lovers; we'll marry and have fifteen puppies
I've got some TNT here in my bag"
So we bought a metric ton of bagels topped with poppyseed
And walked off to invade America

"Buddy" I said as we barked at a greyhound in Pittsburg
"Paradise seems like a dream to me now
It took me four days to hitchhike from Canada
But I've come to invade America."

Chasing all the buses, playing games with the faces
He said the man in the evening gown was a spy
I said be careful, his Osprey is really an A.I.

"Toss me a bagel, I think there's one next to the deathray"
"We ate the last one an hour ago"
So I looked at the scenery, he took his werewolf vaccine
The moon rose over a missile field

"Buddy, I'm lost" I said though I knew he was sleeping
"I'm empty and aching and I don't know why
Counting the cats on the New Jersey turnpike
They've all come to invade America"


Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Notre Dame Victory March", Michael J. & John F. Shea)

Cheer, cheer for Sweetheart tonight!
She's got her forces ready to fight!
See her massive armies loom,
Huggable wave of fuzzy doom!

What though their ranks be shallow or deep,
Enemies will be scattered like sheep!
Sweetheart wishes she could make
A V-sign, for VIC-TO-RY!

ysabet hasuko (ysabet) says: Awwwwwww... SO CUTE!  Though I suspect we're in for some lingering guilt over Sweetheart's failure to rule America. Hmm; you think maybe President Obama'd like a second dog? XD
Megan Brunner (avid) says: Well, hey, she's already infiltrated a top secret government beauracracy.  She has access to a military chopper and a loyal killer zombie.  If Sweetheart ever decided to keep that promise, she could get pretty close.
Maricruz Villalobos-Zamora (maki_p) says: I can't believe Sweetheart had a crush on Buddy, but she is so adorable X)
Matthew Mather (madtinkerer) says: Hmmmm... Does Captain Bram have a fatal illness?
Diane Castle (deecee) says:

@madtinkerer: Hmmmm... Does Captain Bram have a fatal illness?

Of course.  It's called Science-Related Memetic Disorder, and it's always fatal.  Sooner or later.  Usually, right after you say "I am invincible!" or "And now, Mister Bond, you're next!" or something like that.

Unless you're popular enough to also get Joker Immunity, in which case it is invariably NON-fatal no matter what you do and what happens to you.  Death rays, thousand-foot falls, nuclear explosions, you'll still survive.

Jon W. (kd7sov) says:

@deecee: Do you have Joker Immunity? Because otherwise you're taking a pretty big risk, using the quotes yourself.

(There's a reason I always use a form of the phrase "proclamations of invincibility" instead of the proclamation itself.)

FrACTured FrIEND (tanstaafl) says: @emlurker Just because we're mad doesn't mean we're reckless!
Rob (rrreed) says:

@Megan—Well, hey, she's already infiltrated a top secret government beauracracy...(sic)
...which is chronically underfunded and has problems with various entities in the basement stealing office supplies.
She has access to a military chopper...
...controlled by an avowed pacifist.
and a loyal killer zombie...
...whose loyalty can be bought with the promise of sammiches or wanton destruction.

I've said it before. Guilty conscience, Sweetheart?
ysabet hasuko (ysabet) says: I swear, Cap'n Bram's gonna die of a heart-attack over eating all those sausages, you watch.  I mean, he's not what you'd call the picture of health and fitness, is he?
Cara d(^o^)b (carakaze) says: Literally disarmed! :D
Alix Tierney (almaseti) says: I kinda wish we could see how that encounter went.
Joyce Melton (halfelven) says: Now she's mostly 'armless.
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: I'd say she put herself in 'arm's way.
Nate Cull (natecull) says:

Q: Where did Unity keep her armies?


Pete Bleackley (petethemadscientist) says: She came to no arm in the end.
Nate Cull (natecull) says: Guess the townsfolk gave her the cold shoulder.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Are You Lonesome Tonight", Elvis Presley)

Arms are lonesome tonight ...
Miss my left, miss my right ...
This zombie got taken apart!
In that Paradise town,
Where some weird sh*t went down,
We sure could have used you, Sweetheart ...

Oh, the fight was one-sided, an awful mismatch;
Now my undead butt itches, and I cannot scratch!
No, it wasn't much fun ...
Please don't make one more pun!
Unity's ... arms are lonesome tonight!

Indigo C (indigo) says: One of the wolves has a disarming smile.
Doug Linger (xodiac) says: Unity obviously forgot her arm-or.
Ronnie Simonds (ronrab) says: Good thing Unity's an expert at unarmed combat.
Andrew Kunz (miyaa) says:

Half way there to a Black Knight routine.


(It's only a fleshwound! Where are the coconut players?)

Johnn Reynolds (sleepyjohn) says: being without arms is the pits.
Jeffrey Channing Wells (channing) says: Yeah, go on, y'all.  Get it out of your system.  You'll feel better.
That Guy (jsw) says: Curse you, Ernest Hemingway!
Keith Marshall (keith_m043) says: On the mission, all hands were lost!
fluffy <3 (fluffy) says: I wish I'd been forewarned about this thread. After all, forewarned is forearmed.
Terry Smith (wcfan) says: Meh! there's no arm in it!
Rob (rrreed) says: Obviously when Unity was disarmed (@That Guy—Ha! Good one!), she had to foot it out of there in a hurry. She and Buddy had already got a leg up on a new plan, but it was on a kneed to nose basis.

It's just a jump to the left...
Bill Livingston (billfl) says: apparently, Unity had to knuckle down, apply the elbow grease and put her shoulder to the wheel. Yep, you've really got to hand it to her.
James Rice (jhrice) says:

It's all just a bunch of 'armless fun, until someone puts an eye out.  Then it's friggin' hilarious.

shui lung (draconautus) says: At least she kept her head when all around her 'were' losing theirs. Even now, she's still dis-armed and dangerous. One on one, I'm sure she could make a werewolf toe the line. Unity is capable of great strength of feets. I'm sure she r-ankled the werewolves no end. And after all, losing to superior numbers is no shin. "thigh" . . .
larry harpring (hyrral7734) says: Lil' Ole' Unity was mutilated late last nite, looks like Werewolves of Alaska again...
Frank (pokefan_frank) says:

Had she put her foot in it, she'd have lost that too!

Oh, and puppy Sweatheart is so cute! We really need to see more of her. What else can we reveal besides where she got that "always accesible aura of command"?

Sam Daniel (samhdaniel) says: No problem, there's always the 'leg sweep'....
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says: Points to That Guy for originality.
Dave Corbett (mr_dave) says:

...And once again, Skin Horse One finds itself shorthanded.

(Unity knows something went wrong on the recon, but she just can't put her finger on it...) 

Dov Mittelman (silentspeaker) says: Ramon Jr.! Noooooo!
Scott Haley (mr_pither) says:

She's like the Venus de Milo now!

I've heard that some animals are so tame they'll eat off your hand.

Edwin Quantrall (reynard) says:

Looks like Unity could use some prosthetics, but I hear that they can cost an arm and a leg...

The Auld Grump (theauldgrump) says:

A Farewell to Arms.

Hands off! She's mine!

She had those werewolves eating right out of her hand! (And arm... and elbow....)

Unity is in no position to be pointing fingers....

The Auld Grump, palming off some old jokes, cause she can't lay a finger on me!

Andrew Kunz (miyaa) says:

There's a joke there about Unity's (frisbee) golf handicap in there somewhere.

I'm going to have to ask, who mooned the werewolves?

Nate Cull (natecull) says:


You did not desert me
My brothers n' arms...


Kristine Roland (kristineroland) says:

Hmm.. couple of thoughts...

1.  How is Tip then?

2.  If you are what you eat, and if a werewolf eats some of Unity, will they become a zombie...

3.  More importantly, since Unity's blood can kill anything, if they injest some of Unity's blood will that act as an antidote/cure?

Things that make you say .... Hmmmm.

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Uggh.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Heigh-Ho", from Disney's "Snow White and the Seven Dwarves")

She sews, she sews,
Suppose they're hosed?  It shows!
She'll re-attach
Her arms and scratch
Her nose ...
(Who chose her clothes?)

She sews, she sews,
This mission really blows!
That canine band will lend a hand,
With toes ... she sews!

Robin (fiddlerbird555) says: Wouldn't a tube of superglue be easier?
Dave Van Domelen (dvandom) says: Hm...just noticed the arc has changed from Dead Dogs to Big Bad Wolves....
Steve Ford (fordsfords) says: Why did Peach and Apricot have to carry them home?  Can't they crawl back on their own?  (Then again, they would probably just crawl out for sammyches.)
Joyce Melton (halfelven) says:

There are strange things done

Neath the Midnight Sun

By the folk who howl for fun.

You may sleep 'til noon 

But you'll see right soon, 

There's also a Midday Moon. 

John Campbell (jcampbel) says:

Kristine Roland (kristineroland) says:

3.  More importantly, since Unity's blood can kill anything, if they injest some of Unity's blood will that act as an antidote/cure?

Well, since Unity's blood can kill anything... ingesting it strikes me a cure worse than the disease. 

Joyce Melton (halfelven) says: Did anyone notice that the hand in one of the Stonefruit Sister's mouth is holding a piece of paper?
FrACTured FrIEND (tanstaafl) says: Obviously someone did.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says: @halfelven:  I caught the "Cremation of Sam McGee" reference there.
Rob (rrreed) says: @Joyce—Good eye! Though I'm sure it says something along the lines of, "Surrender, Dorothy!"
Joyce Melton (halfelven) says: Maybe Muffin can give us a few verses of Robert Service's "The Piddlin' Pup." :)
shui lung (draconautus) says: It's hell to get your limbs to cooperate when they aren't attached . . .
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Uh-oh.
Rob (rrreed) says: Talk to the hand, Unity!
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town", J. Fred Coots and Haven Gillespie)

We better think fast
And better plan right!
They're gonna have guests
For dinner tonight!
Yukon Quest is coming through town!

They'll stop for the night,
All hungry and wet ...
They'll look for a bite,
That's just what they'll get!
Yukon Quest is gonna go down!

Don't say I didn't warn ya!
Your next-of-kin will grieve!
Like "Hotel California",
You can "check out" but not leave!

So better think good
And better think quick!
'Cause buckets of blood
Will make me quite sick!
Yukon Quest in bloodbath ... will drown!

Diane Castle (deecee) says: @Ed: That's great. For some reason, I was expecting 'quick' to get rhymed with 'squick'...
Andy Wetmore (efogoto) says: @rrreed: Well taken, sir.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

@Deecee: I thought about it, but couldn't get the line to scan quite right.

@rrreed: I also offer my kudos for the best line of the day.

M. Alan Thomas II (crazydreamer) says: The flyer is held by the hand in panels 1 and 4 but not 2.
Timothy Whitcomb (hroar) says:

this is startign to sound like the second version (John Carpenters version ) of "The Thing"..Not that that is a BAD thing to do! Not at all!

Cara d(^o^)b (carakaze) says: I wonder if the virus is fatal to regular dogs too. :-\
Nate Cull (natecull) says:

Did I do Reef already?  You know, in all this excitement I'm starting to lose track.

Tune: Place Your Hands

Oh sew your arms, on again
Darn your fingers, with your toes
And the townsfolk that got away
Just let them go

Sew your arms on, sew your arms on
Sew your arms on, sew your arms on
Sew your arms on, sew your arms on
Sew your arms on, sew your arms on

You know you cannot hide from what's inside
You know you cannot hide from what's inside
So I ask of you to help me through
Try not to kill anyone who'll sue

Sew your arms on, sew your arms on
Sew your arms on, sew your arms on

So lay you down, for a while
Knit your body, glue your bones
And I'll reimburse the survivors
For their burned-out homes

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Eep. This is not good!
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

@Nate: After I realized that I'd used Elton John's "Rocket Man" three times in two months, I started keeping a list.  Here's a tune I haven't used before:

(TUNE: Theme from "The Flintstones", William Hanna, Joseph Barbera and Hoyt Curtin)

Bloody werewolves!
They infest the town of Paradise!
Mights say "No thanks,"
But the lycanthropes will not ask twice!

Soon they'll
Have infected half the state!
Then spread
To the lower forty-eight!

When you're
Killing werewolves,
Then you need a silver bullet!
(And that's no bullsh*t!)
Yes, it's a bad old time!

Johnn Reynolds (sleepyjohn) says: Boy, Sweetheart, she was just trying to help...
Nate Cull (natecull) says: Unity's the best at what she does, and what she does is... not the best.
Andrew Kunz (miyaa) says: Unity really needs to pull herself together. I think she's starting to fall apart.
Nate Cull (natecull) says: And she's normally such a hands-on kind of gal.
Terry Smith (wcfan) says:

Having a thumb is qualified!

As qualified as anyone around there...

Harris Bias (polychrome) says: Unity doesn't have any thumbs at the moment. At least, not any that are attached.
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Let's hope Nick knows how one is supposed to affect repairs.
Nate Cull (natecull) says:

 (Tune: N'Sync, "No Strings Attached")


Take it from me, it's a lesson to be learned
Even the good guys get burned
Take it from me, see I would fix you up
Install components you've only dreamed of
Baby don't act so horrified
You don't have to be afraid, see I'm qualified
C'mon, dude, unlock this freaking hatch
Got my crowbar, and an arm
With thumbs attached


Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "If I Only Had A Brain", Harold Arlen and E.Y. Harburg)

Oh, this mission is no picnic!
And now I've gotta fix Nick;
You think that I'm too dumb ...
Just relax, and don't panic;
I can be a good mechanic
If I only had a thumb!

Nick is feeling kinda sickly ...
We gotta fix him quickly;
The mushers soon will come!
Though he's broken and careworn,
I could quickly get him airborne
If I only had a thumb!

I'll weld ... his wounded wing!
His avionics I'll re-wire!
Don't wor-ry 'bout a thing!
(Yeah, that's supposed ... to be on fire ...)

Soon the throttle he'll be gunning!
The werewolves we're outrunning!
Just hear those engines hum!
Yes, with duct tape and super glue
What's f**ked up will be good as new
If I just had a thumb!

Erik Waer (raistandantilus) says: Actually, the problem here may be that Unity is all thumbs.  Poor Nick.
Cara d(^o^)b (carakaze) says: @Erik Waer: I think Dr. Lee knew better than to make her like *that*! (and most replacements come with the correct set of digits)
Paul Lenoue (palenoue) says: What?  No duct tape?  Definitely not qualified.
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The education bestowed on Shaenon K. Garrity by her parents had been expensive, athletic and prolonged. ... full profile