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Smithson Thus Far... ·

Peter Janits (grimereaper) says:

I thought a hungry Unity might be a problem.

Ah, but which is worse, a hungry Unity, or a killer Moustachio?

woozy (woozy) says:

>>>but which is worse, a hungry Unity, or a killer Moustachio?

I don't know.  They'd both geld my llama.

Benjamin Whetham (crosshair) says:

Oh come on, like Sweetheart could kill anyone. We saw what happened the last time she "snapped". *RAMPAGE*

I wonder when they are going to figure out how this happened.

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "I Walk The Line", Johnny Cash)

Mou-sta-chi-o was quiet and aloof ...
Got wound too tight, we might have made a goof!
Now Doctor Lee is stuck up on the roof ...
Indulge my whims!  I eat her limbs!

Why do we hire folks with a deadly skill?
Why don't we screen out those who like to kill?
Well if we did, not one post could we fill!
It's looking grim!  She'll eat our limbs!

John Sears (john_sears) says:

Unity, stay on the wagon, you're a role model!


John Sears (john_sears) says:

Although... if she ate Tip's arms, that would mean no more therapy puppets.

Is this a Greater Good situation? 

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: *sigh*
Andrew Kunz (ampersand888) says: Who's Virginia?
ribbles (ribbles) says: Dr. Virginia Lee.
David Harmon (mental_mouse) says: Well, remember that there's another staff member on the roof, and he can fly!
John Sears (john_sears) says:

My first reaction to that 'he can fly' comment was:

"Santa's part of Project Skin Horse?" 

This holiday season has officially gone on far too long. 

woozy (woozy) says:

>>> "Santa's part of Project Skin Horse?" 

Well, Santa's sentient and, modus nolens, not human so...

 Hee hee.  Santa on the Skin Horse Team... would that geld the llama or what!

Rob (rrreed) says:

"Why don't we screen out employees that could snap and kill us all?" + "Because then we'd have no staff, Tip." ==>

Tip could snap and kill them all?
John Sears (john_sears) says:

I can imagine a scenario where Tip gets runs in his hose, the store is out of leave-in conditioner, his bad-hair-day hat blows off in the parking lot, Unity (through no fault of her own mind) gets Zombie Juices on his favorite skirt and Sweetheart shed all over his office chair (and hence all his dry-clean only apparel).

Oh yes, Tip could kill. 

gmadoll789 (gmadoll789) says:

Skin Horse is needed!!
M. Alan Thomas II (crazydreamer) says:

So this story arc starts with Tip dating Marcie. Tip actually seems happy when Chris gets jealous. Now we've got a loose nuke (literally), which would seem to be right up the DoI's alley. . . .

Who wants to bet that this storyline ends with Chris saving the day, discovering that he's fine as he is and doesn't need to be like Tip, and getting Marcie back? 

Corgi (corgi) says: Have you lot seen Nick's LiveJournal?  That's sounding awfully defensive/jealous over there.
Andrew Kunz (ampersand888) says:

What's with everyone using the "geld my llama" allusion? Why couldn't we be gelding alpacas instead? Or how about a lama?



So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Oh.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Bus Stop", The Hollies)

Cuss not!  Don't swear!
Watch it, take care!
Kindly watch your language ...
Cuss word censored,
No offense word
Plugged into my language!

I can be quite gentleman-ly,
Cultured, if I wish ...
If I try, I'll show that I
Can be polite as fish!

I'm as nice as any other mulder-foxy guy!
I'll send an IM to those barstools down the hall ...
Tough to get a call through with this shorted-amp WiFi;
If you don't like it, you can take a flying fly!

Nate Cull (natecull) says:

(TUNE: Cute Is What We Aim For, "Doctor")

Here we are trapped on the roof
The BLINTZING Wifi's down
We've got no backup
This SHIFT is out of control

But this emergency
Brought us Doctor Lee

She'll be our doctor!
She'll be our cure!
She'll be our medicine and more!
Closeups gratuitiously
So all the fans agree
Don't unlock that door!

Jack Beattie (jackmann) says: Y'know, something about Nick's dialog here reminds me of Mal from Firefly.
woozy (woozy) says:

>>What's with everyone using the "geld my llama" allusion?

Is everyone using it?  Or is it just me?

 I'm trying to get "geld the llama" into popular parlance.  It's a task I was shouldered with this Christmas.  As to what it actually means... Well, I figure first I need to get people saying it and then it will decide its own meaning.

woozy (woozy) says:

>>>Another LLAMA-GELDING FUDGE-TOP operation

 Ah!  Success ... of a sort ...

William Tracy (afishionado) says: Before this goes too much farther, you guys should look up the definition of the word "geld".
woozy (woozy) says:

>>Before this goes too much farther, you guys should look up the definition of the word "geld".


Funny... since I started this I've got a lot of people telling me "geld means to castrate" as though I might not know that. 

 Which confuses me because if geld meant anything else, I can't imagine the aphorism being as catchy as it is.  That really spays my poodle!  Nueters my donkey, Eunochs my capon, etc. etc.

Dave Corbett (mr_dave) says:

It would be rather difficult to eunuch a capon.

Either that, or absurdly easy, depending on your criteria for success. 

woozy (woozy) says: Perhaps I should have written "Capons my rooster", and  .... why didn't I write "Capons my rooster"?
Rob (rrreed) says: @woozy—that really whip's the llama's ass.
Eric Burns (ericburns) says: And now, expert analysis!
Justin Kane (avatarjk137) says: My opinion on this strip is also REDACTED.
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: It could be worse-- it could have talked about REDACTED being redacted.
Nate Cull (natecull) says: Tune and REDACTED lyrics: "New Year", Death Cab for Cutie)

So this is the New Year
And I don't feel REDACTED
The REDACTED crystal
Explosions off in the distance
In the distance

So this is the New Year
REDACTED resolutions
Problems with REDACTED solutions

So everybody put your REDACTED on
Let's make believe that we're REDACTED for just this once
As thirty REDACTED bleed into one

So this is the new year
So this is the new year

I wish the world was flat like REDACTED
Then I could travel just by folding REDACTED
There'd be no REDACTED could hold us back
There'd be no REDACTED could hold us back
There'd be no REDACTED could hold us back
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Complicated", Avril Lavigne)

Last week, went to someplace where
They did ... things they do out there.
Then I met some people,
Told them stuff ... just enough.

I just got promoted, but
I must not reveal for what!
I filed paperwork for stuff to buy,
Then later, I ...

Went to a spot,
Did quite a lot,
Just like before,
Did it some more;
I filled out a form,
It's all in a normal day ...

All the information in my note just got REDACTED,
It's classified, yeah!
All the words with meaning in the message have been extracted!
I can't confide, yeah,
Where I go, what I know, what I do, and to who,
What I say, anyway, you know they'd
Take it and they'd break it 'til the information's been subtracted!
(That's OK ...)

vicka corey (drbrain) says: nick's lucky those folks didn't write *his* censorship software.
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Y-E-A-H!

Also: Dr. Lee looks as hot as ever-- even when she's indignant.
Andy Wetmore (efogoto) says:

Which does Doc Lee wanna hear:

 "I want you, I need you, but there ain't no way I'm ever gonna love you, but don't feel sad, 'cause two out of three ain't bad"

 "On a hot summer night would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses?"

"Like a bat out of Hell, I'll gone when the morning comes"

That album is all about Tip.

Mark Chapman (aardvark86) says:

@So It Begins: Dr. Lee looks as hot as ever-- even when she's indignant.

Especially when she's indignant, and blushing ];-)

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

Well, since you mentioned it ... 
(TUNE: "Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad", Meat Loaf)

Doctor Lee, you look so fine ...
But there's no way we can get it on!
I'll just go crazy if I keep that thought ...
I gotta try and block it now!

Doctor, I wish you were mine ...
I wish that you could stay with me until the dawn!
You make me crazy 'cause you look so hot...
And 'cause you're in my cockpit now!

I've tried forgetting you, Virginia Lee!
I've tried ignoring all your lovely charms ...
I've dreamed of holding you so close to me ...
But there's no way, to my dismay,
When I got ailerons instead of arms!

I hope you can see,
It's really buggin' me!

Got no lips, got no hands,
And I also miss a couple vital glands!
Well, I wish I could ... (wish I could)
"Cause zero for three ain't good!

Elaine Corvidae (elaine_corvidae) says:

Er, no offense, but wouldn't that be "old fogey music" to someone Nick's age? He wouldn't have been born for quite a while after that was recorded (1977); his parents would have been listening to it.

Then again, maybe that's why he chose it; maybe he thinks of Dr. Lee as old or as a parental figure?

M. Alan Thomas II (crazydreamer) says: Perhaps Meatloaf is forever? But then, that wouldn't explain the food poisoning I got last week. . . .
Andrew Kunz (ampersand888) says: He's a child of the 90's. What else would you expect?
Shaenon Garrity (shaenongarrity) says:

Nick has some old stuff he listens to. He seems to be into Rush for some reason.
Archemedes Rex (archemedesrex) says: Nick's probably thinking: "I can see Paradise by my dashboard cameras." Sorry, I couldn't help it.
Norman Thallheimer (norman) says:

Nobody seems to have noticed:  The title of the album got through the profanity filters.

Nick may have stumbled onto a way to set his own curse.

Sean Riedinger (ariamaki) says:


Maybe that ellipsis from the Good Doctor in the last panel is not a lack of surity in the music-- Maybe it is questioning how Nick just managed to say Hell uncensored.

John Sears (john_sears) says:

This possible loophole reminds me of the Simpsons, when Bart learned that he could get away with calling someone a 'bastard' if, in fact, they were one (under the original definition).


Michael Brewer (wusemajor) says: She's pretty good at Guitar Hero.
Nick Lardas (voyager) says: The wierd irony is, apparently the Kiowa ready crews spend most of their time playing Rock Band, so that really is what the helicopter  crews do when they're standing around their choppers waiting for the other shoe to drop...
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: *BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA*
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Wind Beneath My Wings", written by Gary Morris)

First, put your right hand on the strum bar,
Then put your left hand on the frets ...
Follow the dots upon the screen:
Blue, orange, yellow, red, and green ...

Practice your hammer-ons and pull-offs ...
This is as metal as it gets!
Building your Star Power to the max ...
'Til you unlock the hidden tracks!

Did you know you rock at Guitar Hero?
You're shredding like I wish I could shred!
Your fingers fly up and down that key row ...
Can't get your face out of my head!

Nate Cull (natecull) says:


And I would do anything for love
A mutant lion or werewolf pack
I would do anything for love
But I'll never sleep with you and that's a fact

And I'll never feel the way you feel for me right now
Oh no, no way
And I would do anything for love
Oh I would do anything for love
I would do anything for love
But I won't do you

Paul Gadzikowski (pgadzikowski) says: Salsa? Caramel!
Justin Grubbs (jjgrubbs) says: It's so wonderful to see her so relaxed.
Andy Wetmore (efogoto) says: Them salsa bugles will definitely help you chili out.
John Breckenridge (jbrecken) says: With a name like Moishe, it sounds like Nick's family is Jewish.  I hope they're not the orthodox types who feel that a proper burial needs an intact body.
Brian Rogers (billionsix) says: According to Nick's Livejournal, he's pretty orthodox, actually.
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Ah.
Nate Cull (natecull) says:


(Tune: "Purple People Eater", Sheb Wooley)

Well I saw the things chewin' through the big blast doors
They had tiny robot scowls on their tiny robot jaws
I commenced to freakin' and I said "Wilkin!
Whydja send the tungsten eater robots in?"

They were the angry hungry tungsten eater robots!
Angry hungry tungsten eater robots!
Angry hungry tungsten eater robots!
Why do we even have these?

Well they ate through the doors and their jaws went -click-
I said "Hey there tungsten eaters, don't eat Nick!"
I heard them say through the smoking cloud
"Carbon unit stand aside or be devoured"

They were the angry hungry tungsten eater robots!
Angry hungry tungsten eater robots!
Angry hungry tungsten eater robots!
What idiot built these?

I said "Hey tungsten eaters, time to demob!"
They said "Negative. Eating angry hungry tungsten's our job
But that chopper right there is the angriest thing we've seen
He's an angry hungry tungsten robot eating machine!

He's an angry hungry tungsten robot eater!
He's an angry hungry tungsten robot eater!
He's an angry hungry tungsten robot eater!
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Somebody To Love", Jefferson Airplane)

Well, I never wanted ... a relationship!
The lady-clothes ... don't detract from Tip!

No, it's more his all-around that!
It's bizarre wherever he's at!
We had sex, he kept on his hat!
Yeah, it's more his all-around that!

He's sending robots ... to eat the door!
When there is weirdness ... he brings more!

See, it's more his all-around that!
See him grin, like a Cheshire Cat!
Salsa Bugles making me fat!
Yeah, it's more his all-around that!

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

OK, I think I got another of Shaenon's little Easter Eggs.  I was just catching up on Nick's LiveJournal, and he mentioned "Shelby", the bald guy in Maintenance.  Everyone else was calling him "Mr. Silvers".

Shelby Silvers = Shel Silverstein?  Check it out ...

Drew (pseudowolf) says: Hmm...I wonder what type of fuel is "kosher"?
Dieter M. (tangerine) says:

No offshore petroleum?

Sam Setter (eraser820) says: Well, V22 is a turboprop.  So, it can burn just about anything that doesn't present a detonation danger (such as gasoline or nitro-methanol).  So if you want kosher fuel, make Biodiesel!  To insure its kosher-ness obtaining all veg oil to make it either unused, or arrange a collection deal with all area restaurants that serve only kosher foods.
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The education bestowed on Shaenon K. Garrity by her parents had been expensive, athletic and prolonged. ... full profile