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Smithson Thus Far... ·

Norman Thallheimer (norman) says:

Is that anything like a security blanket?  Only, more like a broom handle?

Justin Grubbs (jjgrubbs) says:

Poor Ira, he must be so lonely.

Dave Van Domelen (dvandom) says: Wonder what happened in '78?
woozy (woozy) says:

>>>Wonder what happened in '78?

Ira was hired?

Rob (rrreed) says: All bets are off if Ira begins a sentence with, "Don't recall, sir." This is the man who's been mind wiped one time too many we're talking about.
Nate Cull (natecull) says:

(TUNE: "Amnesia", Chumbawamba)

Remember Ira, the sole survivor
Of Annex One Security
Trapped in the never-never

Did reality break back in '78
Living out a hot date with his personal Fate
A happy ever after
Or echoes of a future disaster?

Does he suffer from long term memory loss?
I don't recall... miss?
Does he suffer from long term memory loss?
I don't recall... miss?

He sings the same old verse
Walks it over as he whistles to work
What goes around, comes around,
again, again, again
His heart's pulled apart
Mushrooms blooming in the dark
Blood is red, bones are white
Something in Accounting doesn't like the light

Does he suffer from long term memory loss?
I don't recall... miss?
Does he suffer from long term memory loss?
I don't recall... sir?

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Highway To The Danger Zone", Kenny Loggins)

Rallying my team -- ready now, and here we go!
Danger is extreme -- time to see Moustachio!

Heading into danger soon!
Things are getting stranger soon!

Here's security -- telling him it's "sir", not "ma'am" ...
He's got loyalty, can't remember worth a damn!

Heading into danger now!
With an Army Ranger now!

Jeffrey Channing Wells (channing) says: Obligatory virus note: Since I cannot reproduce the virus finding on normal use, and am unwilling to scuttle what security protocols are apparently stopping me from reproducing it, please let us know if there is any change for the better. No need to fill the comment section with "Yep, still bad!"-style announcements, just let us know if it improves. Thankey!
David Harmon (mental_mouse) says:

JCW: The last time this happened (to webcomicsnation as a whole) I complained to the reporting site, and got the following informative links in the autoreply. The explanations there include links to various page-analysis tools.

Moe Lane (moelane) says:

They need to fix Ira.

Mark Felt (markfelt) says:

It's been fixed, WCN's html editor ('TinyMCE - Javascript WYSIWYG Editor') was hijacked. Someone put Javascript code at the top of the editor code that opens a very small nested page frame to an off site location.

What was hijacked is the area for entering text for a new comment (which uses the TinyMCE HTML editor). As long as you were showing the 'Add a comment' text box, the malware would still be part of your page.

Kenneth Graves (kag) says:

The security staff was all let go in '78 (budget cuts).  Ira forgot he'd been fired.

Mike Kozar (mikekozar) says: @Graves:  The Department of Mind Control Application's chief Researcher, Dr. Shane, got him added officially as a live-in experiment on the long-term effects of the Mark 3, and unofficially as a example to the Brass of why funding for the Mark 4 was so important. It turns out that funding for biological experiments is awarded based on the smallest lab animal that can do the job, and at 184 pounds, Ira qualified for Tier 7 funding, which nearly doubled his annual income.  Interestingly enough, the shock seemed to overcome his memory damage temporarily;  when he was informed he would be getting a significant pay raise, his response was to exclaim "DOMCA Shane!" 
(idv) says:

Indeed, it has been fixed (and TinyMCE appears to have been upgraded to the current release in the process).

I just hope that the original method of ingress has been identified and fixed.

Rob (rrreed) says: @Nate—Excellent choice of songs, sir!

@Mike—ARRRRRGH! The pain!
Rob (rrreed) says: Let me guess: the other security guard was named Guildenstern?
Carl Fishman (carlfishman) says: But I thought Rosenkrantz and Guilderstern were dead?
Rob (rrreed) says: I did say, "was named". :)
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Sister Golden Hair", America)

Well, I felt I should have stopped her,
But it got to be too late;
Got on board that helicopter
So we could evacuate ...
I'm not sure what's going on here,
But I know, at times, I find
That I really wish I had a piece of mind!

Well, I know she's 'round here somewhere,
Lady evil scientist!
Now, I'm feeling kinda dumb; there
Are some details I have missed!
Seems she's standing right beside me,
How 'bout that?  I didn't know ...
So I guess I'll shake her hand and say hello!

How do you do?  It's nice to meet you!
My name's Ira Rosenkrantz!
I'd like to fight you and defeat you
If you give me half a chance!
Though I might regret it ...
I'm so confused now ...
I just don't get it ...

Dave Van Domelen (dvandom) says: Both the cobras and the evil scientist are adorable, though.
Adam Underfoot (unnatural20) says:

o/` Times are strange
We got a free upgrade for
snakes on a plane... o/`

Cara d(^o^)b (carakaze) says: @Carl Fishman: Being dead is no excuse for missing work!
John Sears (john_sears) says:

Thanks Adam, now that song is stuck in my head.

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Heh.
Rob (rrreed) says: Dr. Lee isn't evil, she's just drawn that way (in an evil overlord fashion, not a Jessica Rabbit fashion, that is).
John Chapman (slabgar) says:

Ira is the evil scientist.  The world should beware, now that he's away from his mindwipes...

Michael Brewer (wusemajor) says:

I totally missed that the cobras are now on a plane.

Norman Thallheimer (norman) says:

Some things you want to make sure of, before the nuke goes off ^_^.

Cara d(^o^)b (carakaze) says: Nukes going off means fewer brains to chomp. ^^;
Nate Cull (natecull) says:

Stop him? I thought you guys had finally picked the winning team!



Rob (rrreed) says: "A strange game. The only winning move is not to play. How about a nice game of chess?"
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Who's Sorry Now?", Connie Francis)

Just making sure ... just making sure ...
Your comprehension, and attention span's poor!
Just let me add, you know we've had
Talks about how "Fire ... bad!"

Mou-sta-chi-o ... must go, although
He pledged to "Lurch For The Cure" ...
He must be stopped!  Bomb can't be dropped!
Good girl!  I'm just making sure!

Nate Cull (natecull) says:

(Tune: "Don't Get Me Wrong", The Pretenders)

Don't get me wrong
If I tell you our receptionist
Has got a nuclear weapon
And plans to kill us all
Don't get me wrong
If I say that a mad scientist
Is loading snakes onto a plane -
One of those things is bad
Don't get me wrong

Don't get me wrong
If it all sounds complicated
Just think about the fireworks
They're the wrong kind of fireworks
Don't get me wrong
We don't want you to kill anyone
Okay we want you to kill someone
But he's not really someone

He's a machine
Not that that means
He's not our friend
But he's not our friend
Suddenly somehow
He slipped a gear
Who can explain?
Was our killbot insane?
Well he had to have been to work here -

Don't get me wrong.

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

OK, I could have taken the melody from "Hair" (which I've already used) or the old "My Little Pony" TV commercial (which, I am ashamed to admit, I actually remember).  If I had used the latter, then I would've had to find someone to come and kill me.

(TUNE: "Rainy Day People", Gordon Lightfoot)

My Little Chrissie!  Marcie really likes your brushable hair ...
My Little Chrissie!  She would love to run her fingers through there!
She'd like to braid it!  You can't be sure how it looks 'til you try ...
Just like a big grouchy My Little Pony!  (You're ready to die!)

Shaenon Garrity (shaenongarrity) says:

For the interested, Chris's "Steam Powered" shirt is the work of "Wondermark" creator David Malki! and can be purchased by the public here:

That's right, I plug the T-shirts of other webcomics. This is why I've never made any money off this cartooning thing. I'd just spend it on booze.
Andy Wetmore (efogoto) says:

Ed, you wouldn't have had to go looking. We'd have shown up en masse with pitchforks and torches.

Woof Arf (woofnarf) says:

Shaenon - "..."I've never made any money off this cartooning thing.  I'd just spend it on booze."

You say it like it's a bad thing or something...

Kathy Moon (flipkat) says:

Ed, why not Lightfoot's "Pony Man" instead?

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Hahaha!
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

@flipkat:  "Rainy Day People" is a better-known song, and matches the meter of "My Little Pony".  Although I am familiar with "Pony Man".  I'll keep that in mind for the future.

Scott Malcomson (calbeck) says:

I would squee if a woman said that to me. -:D

Adam (10-0-0-1) says: And sweetheart shows why I love her so much.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Swinging On A Star", Jimmy Van Heusen and Johnny Burke)

Say, would you like to climb up this shaft?
And overcome the smell and the draft?
At security, Shelby laughed!
(We must resist the urge to narc!)

The shaft has security to keep us outside;
We just use a comb to override!
It vi-o-lates official protocol,
But if we don't, we'll see a high death toll!
We'll see if Sweetheart will squeal, instead of bark ...
She must resist the urge to narc!

Benjamin Whetham (crosshair) says:

Awwww. Poor Sweetheart. She is in such a Catch-22 right now. Her face looks absolutely adorable.

Mark Orr (agentoracle) says:

I have to say this:  You draw dogs exceedingly well.  The expression, the posture... everything.  I know this is late (should have said it back during the werewolf story) but it's very, very true.

John Sears (john_sears) says:

Ahh, security.  You can build the most elaborate, perfect system imaginable, and then someone will undermine it to save five minutes work or the trouble of remembering a 10 character password.

So true.

Michael Brewer (wusemajor) says:

You know, there are times when Sweetheart reminds me of a canine version of Felix Unger.

Justin Grubbs (jjgrubbs) says:

Everyone's afraid of something. For me it's telephones.

John Sears (john_sears) says:

I was wondering when Gavotte would show up.

Unity really has nothing to fear.  Beestings can't harm her, and she's a: a federal employee b: far more dangerous to the Shadow Government on the outside causing trouble (and beating guys into a pulp).


woozy (woozy) says:

Funny.  I'm afraid of telephones too.

Heh, heh.  Sweetheart's afraid of frogs...

(Seriously.  I *hate* telephones!  Why can't people just use e-mail...)

Rachel Blackman (rainpacket) says:

I think Unity's terror is less of Gavotte in general, and more just 'oh, no, an authority figure who I am theoretically supposed to obey!'

Besides, the comic timing worked. Who needs explanations? :)

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

@flipkat:  Just because you asked for it ...

(TUNE: "Pony Man", Gordon Lightfoot)

When I'm crawling through the air shaft with a zombie and a dog,
And we're hoping we don't meet up with a slimy, toxic frog,
As we creep along the corridor, as quiet as you please ...
Let's all scream in terror!  It is a swarm of bees!

Well, I'm jumping back in panic, 'til she gives a friendly buzz ...
Then I calm down, for I know that she won't sting my butt because,
I would go into anaphylactic shock, and soon be dead ...
So the Panic Ball gets passed off to Unity instead!

Bryan Stiltz (reaperbryan) says:

I'm afraid of my immediate supervisor, too!

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Aah!
Chris Anthony (etherjammerca) says:

I don't think Sweetheart is afraid of frogs so much as she's familiar with Blaster Master.

John Kayser (gg_crono) says:

Bees. My god.

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The education bestowed on Shaenon K. Garrity by her parents had been expensive, athletic and prolonged. ... full profile