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125 comments:
K C (spotweld) says:

... I *know* these people.

 

Kaesa Aurelia (kaesa) says:

...In a less live-and-let-live fandom, this would be the strip that launched a thousand ship-wars.

Katie Powell (pencilears) says:

I am these people.

Rockphed (rockphed) says:

Wait, there aren't already ship wars in Skin Horse?  Truly this is a strange corner of the internet.

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: All it would take is for Tip to dress up as a 'trap'... then, I suspect the fandom would explode.

Pretty please?
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "I Fought The Law", The Bobby Fuller Four)

In such a quandry now ... I'm caught!
I hate the jerk, but the ... jerk's hot!
I hate the jerk, but the ... jerk's hot!

What impressive abs ... he's got!
I hate the jerk, but the ... jerk's hot!
I hate the jerk, but the ... jerk's hot!

Most days, I'm intellectual,
But right now, that means squat!
I swear, I'm heterosexual ...
I hate the jerk, but the ... jerk's hot!
I hate the jerk, but the ... jerk's hot!

Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says:

I see your shirtless Tip and raise you one naked Capt. Jack Harkness.

Drew (pseudowolf) says:

Chris just needs to remember the Tip Mantra: "He only does it to be annoying."

Justin Kane (avatarjk137) says:

One short day as a werewolf, one long lifetime of fantastic abs.

Rob (rrreed) says: Tsssk. Unstable nuclear devices, always getting in the way of the important stuff! There ought to be a law.
K C (spotweld) says:

I'm betting $5 on Chris retaliating with a Na'vi cosplay.

Brian Rogers (billionsix) says:

Tip is affecting dudes now? He's even more powerful than we imagined!

M Lowe-Hentges (annechen67) says:

The Demonic Charm is strong in this one.

Dieter M. (tangerine) says:

...I forgot that Tip used to be a werewolf/is in remission (not educated in the finer details of lycanthropy)

 

Begs the question, is Tip's hotness or Tip's history of "dancing with the wolves" what she wants to put off until after the nuke is dealt with?

Rachel Blackman (rainpacket) says:

She made him /read/ Snape mpreg fanfic?  Of all the violations of human, physical and natural law that have happened at this facility... that may be the cruelest thing we've yet seen.

Rob (rrreed) says: How appropriate! The Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists set the Doomsday Clock back to six minutes just last month.
John Sears (john_sears) says:

*shudder* Uggh.  Wow.  That's a mental image I never, ever needed.  Thanks a lot, Mr. Wells.

Dieter M. (tangerine) says:

Clearly, she's mastered MPreg data compression.

Jake Alley (googleshng) says:

I assume a whole lot of people won't get the joke here. Should these people be pitied for missing out on a really funny line, or envied for not having the internet teach them this new word yet?

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: "Mpreg" means 'male, pregnant'. In the case of the Harry Potter fanfics, Snape would most likely be carrying Harry's baby. >:)
Pete Bleackley (petethemadscientist) says:

Marcie, dating Tip to make Chris jealous we could forgive. Making him read Harry Potter fanfic, however, is just cruel...

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "She Blinded Me With Science", Thomas Dolby)

It's fiction from the fandom!
She found it on the Internet!
Ridiculous and then some!
As twisty as a plot can get!
Now I'm forced to read her fanfic!
(I'm forced to read her fanfic!)
With images I can't forget!

Stories with Professor Snape ...
(Forced to read your fanfic ... Fanfic!)
Now he's got a pregnant shape ...
(Forced to read your fanfic ... Fanfic!)
So sick!
Fanfic!

Benjamin Whetham (crosshair) says:

Have they tried the "off" button?

Johnn Reynolds (sleepyjohn) says:

I really need a mental image Expelliarmus right about now.

Justin Kane (avatarjk137) says:

Mpreg... one of the Seven Deadly Sins of fanfiction!  If I had to read it, I'd take up drinking and indiscriminate violence.

John Ames (commodorejohn) says: My God, who would've guessed that Marcie of all people could be so cruel? That's some supervillain-caliber meanness right there.
Mel Van Weelden (kessalia) says:

But he DID read them??   That must be true love or something.   

N B (daveclone7) says:

She was just getting back at him for the skutter-slash.

Elaine Corvidae (elaine_corvidae) says:

God in heaven, WHY did I google that? Why? Damn you, Skin Horse. Damn you to hell.

John Goard (darthmiho) says:

Today's comic makes me glad I learned through indirect context what that horror of horrors was back in my wild days trawling the badfic boards of the 'net.

Rob (rrreed) says: Brain bleach all around, on me! *GLUG*

˙˙˙ɹǝɥɔuǝnb ɐɯsɐןd uoısnɟ ʎɔuǝƃɹǝɯǝ ʇɐɥʇ ʇnd ı pıp ǝɹǝɥʍ 'ʍou
Sean Riedinger (ariamaki) says:

Dieter M, you officially made Todays Worst Pun! Grab yourself a prize, using your teeth, from this barrel that is in no way filled with clingy acidic gel! PLEASE!

 

Ja Po (don_as_trae) says:

Firstly, I apologize:

Making him Pregnant! (TUNE: "Dizzy," extended version, Tommy Roe)


*chorus*

Preggers!

They made him pregnant!

The fan girls, they're all dancing!

Cause now he is living in sin,

with slashfic there for the win!

They made him pregnant!

*chorus*


First time, you said the story

was inspired with that glow in you eye -

I thought it was a gift

cause common interest will lead by-and-by

But the the story I saw, it was blue,

with homo-sex on page two

And now his bellies swelling all the time!


*chorus*


Then you brought in number two,

and love made me begin to read

And you talked about symbology

while Snape prepared to recieve his seed.

I love ya', but this torment,

requires brain bleach or shoe cement,

and bigger clothes for his big waist line!


*chorus*


Then you mentioned a

convention trip, and I just had to agree;

'cause your cheeks got red and

I figured we were up to romance speed.

But it was all Spock and Snape

Consensual or basic rape,

and no, again, I'm not enclined!


Oh gods -

*chorus*


Now, I understand that

this makes your motor start to run

But that turkey baster

is not meant for that kind of fun;

and there's no need to test

for Paternity

Cause he's a guy,

as plain to see,

As the fan girls say "oh, he's just fine!"


*chorus*

*chorus*

*chorus unto death*

clark brooks (czark) says:

the first page of google results lists three archives dedicated to *that* fanfic genre. 

David Toboz (professor_zobot) says:

...Tip and Buddy suddenly seem a lot more alike than I would have ever expected.

vicka corey (drbrain) says:

 

plotwise, i think i'm sort of disappointed.  ah well.

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: :blink: :blink:
Terry Smith (wcfan) says:

Let's hear it for the simple things!

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Please Please Me", The Beatles)

I told my friend who's wearing make-up,
"Say, Tip, I think that we should break up!"
We can't go on!
The thrill is gone!
My lust, withdrawn!
You make me yawn!
Please leave me, oh yeah,
And leave me alone!

Tip said, "No problem, we'll stop da-ting!"
Should we continue copula-ting?"
No more, no more!
Not like before!
There's no rapport!
(My **** is sore!)
Please leave me, oh yeah,
And leave me alone!

Woof Arf (woofnarf) says:

OMG...could Tip be the one to bring balance to the Force? in fashionable low heels?  Or is he Mojo incarnate?

Kneel, you unbelievers - KNEEL before our one true master!!!

Rob (rrreed) says: If Tip is Mojo Incarnate, someone will inevitably time travel back into his past to steal it.
Paul Lenoue (palenoue) says:

I wonder if Marcy will write her own "Choose Your Own Adventure" style of fanfic: http://www.boundlessstories.com/

The app is getting close to finished.  How many here want to see a Skin Horse adventure?

John Wells (johnwwells) says:

Thank goodness they removed the planned fuschia and rose wires, or this'd be a little tricky.

Dieter M. (tangerine) says:

Good thing he's not color blind, red is the most common color to not see.

This looks like a job for Tip!

K C (spotweld) says:

Just lick them and cut the one that tastes like nutmeg.

Michael Martin (mcmartin) says:

Anyone old enough and geeky enough to remember CGA graphics displays knows Magenta on sight.  I think the DoI folks should have that cold.

Rob (rrreed) says: On the contrary, it's an extremely well-designed nuke! Evil Overlord Rule #136—"If I build a bomb, I will simply remember which wire to cut if it has to be deactivated and make every wire red."
Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says:

My theory on the 8-crayon box from Crayola is that's all the colors males see. Maybe she should just say "#b31b1b"

John Sears (john_sears) says:

Blast, Rob got to my comment first.  Good show sir.

I'd add only that, if *I* was an evil mastermind, I'd skip the actual use of a timer entirely, while employing a showy fake, and simply cause the bomb to detonate whenever any wire is cut.  I mean, we all know the hero always shows up to stop your evil plan, and they're far more valuable than whatever-it-is that you're actually trying to vaporize.  

John Sears (john_sears) says:

Err, make that 'supposedly' trying to vaporize, because in this case, that thing is the hero.  Or perhaps a two-fer.

Rob (rrreed) says: @John, the timer's covered by Rule #15—"I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117 and the hero is just putting his plan into operation."

If the strip suddenly ends—permanently—in a blinding flash, we'll know it was a superbly designed nuke, created by a true Evil Overlord candidate. However, odds are that:
  1. The nuke will fail to detonate, due to the characters' actions (made saving throw!) or inaction (the Beni box hasn't had maintenance in 50+ years).
  2. The nuke will detonate successfully! But meddling time-travelers from the 68⅓ century will retro-proactively save the cast and create a Stable Time Loop to be explored in a future storyline.
  3. The nuke will partially detonate (a fizzle), preventing serious injury to the main characters but giving us plenty of angst with Marcie and Chris.
#3 would also fall in line with end of Andersen's original "Steadfast Tin Soldier"…
Terry Smith (wcfan) says:

A bit off topic: Remember that in the Evil Overlord Rules it states that you should put the object that can destroy you in a safety deposit box - remember how Voldemort ACTUALLY DID THAT?

I was shocked.

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Karma Chameleon", Culture Club)

When you open up the bomb, what do you see?
Well, for goodness' sakes, don't touch the burgundy!
Can you tell ... which one's magenta?
Can you tell ... the shades of red?
What the hell ... have we got into?
I think we're dead ... I think we're de-ead!

Cut the, cut the, cut the, cut the, cut the carnelian!
This isn't fun!  This isn't fun!
Sucker who designed this thinks he's such a comedian!
Just cut and run!  Just cut and run!

Andrew Kunz (ampersand888) says:

Only Wikipedia would have a page dedicated to all of these colors, and also the history of these colors. (And honestly, these colors are more pink than red to me.)

Sam Ashley (evilmidnightlurker) says:

"Trust me.  I know what I'm doing."

Sam Ashley (evilmidnightlurker) says:

...Of course, you realize this situation was made for Tip.

Edwin Quantrall (reynard) says:

Why is Chris using salad tongs to cut wiring? Wouldn't wire-cutters be better for the job?

P.S. What? No scarlet wires? I guess that they got superseded in the more recent tech specs...

Daniel Baye (pooga) says:

My first thought was that he was using a jumper cable. Okay, honestly I didn't notice the cutters at all initially, but after the "salad tongs" comment, I looked again and thought "jumper cable end".

Robert Kubica (roberttheaddled) says:

With the Thursday strip, - Methinks someone has been watching Penguins of Madagascar - either that or great minds think alike.

John Sears (john_sears) says:

@Rob ahh, but I like the idea of the hero being directly responsible for their own doom.  Perhaps, when the bomb is activated by any wire being cut, a short audio message should play first.  Something like 'Hello Mr. Bond.  Thank you for activating the Spectre-5000 World Domination Device and destroying London.  Please stand near the bomb for a quick and merciful death, or run frantically like a terrified schoolboy, either way, you're doomed.  Even God can't save the queen, have a nice day' - KABOOM

Shaenon Garrity (shaenongarrity) says:

Man, you guys are rough crowd. How come we don't get blindly fawning fans like all the other webcartoonists have? I want people to buy me Wacom tablets and tell me my orc-rape storylines are brilliant and throw a party every time I manage to post a strip without crying.

How'd I get the ones who care about art looking good and stories making sense? This is so unfair.
John Sears (john_sears) says:

I'm pretty fawning, and the civil rights group I co-founded gave you an award.  Doesn't that count for anything?

Norman Thallheimer (norman) says:

Chris definately has more in common with Tip than he likes to admit.

 

John Wells (johnwwells) says:

It's Chekhov's makeover!

Shaenon: Don't worry! If you ever do an orc rape story, I'm sure Ed'll write a great filk for it. The phrase scans especially well to "Heat Wave."

Scott Malcomson (calbeck) says:

Saved by transgender makeover techniques! Yaaaay!

 

....wait.

Shaenon Garrity (shaenongarrity) says:

I blame my webcomic snarkiness on spending the evening with Scott Kurtz. He's a bad influence.
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: ..................
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

John Wells wrote: "Don't worry!  If you ever do an orc rape story, I'm sure Ed'll write a great filk for it."

...and now that's going in my nightmares tonight.

(TUNE: "I Just Called To Say I Love You", Stevie Wonder)

Car-ne-li-an ... the middle one!
If I just cut that wire, the threat will be undone!
For burgundy ... magenta too,
Have got more purple, please don't ask me know I knew!

Though I'm a guy, I can't deny
The reason I was able to identify
Those shades of pur-ple, red, and brown ...
But if I tell you, will I ever live it down?

'Cause I know from testing lipsticks!
Yes, I know, peculiar as it seems ...
I just know from testing lipsticks;
If we live, that's going into Marcie's dreams!

Matt Buchwald (themysticalone) says:

Spending the evening with Scott Kurtz, eh? Does Andrew know? ;)

Nate Cull (natecull) says:

Well she was horny and green
If you know what I mean
And half-orcs have to come from somewhere...

.... !!!

Now I'll never raid for Alliance
Since I saw her standing there

 

John Sears (john_sears) says:

Blast you, John Wells, now I can't help but think of orc-rape lyrics to the songs on the radio.  Thanks to you, I involuntarily orc-ified 'Heartache Tonight' into 'Orc-Rape Tonight', and I'll never think of 'The Waiting' the same way again.

Joyce Melton (halfelven) says:

Courage for Sweetheart is so much of a reflex that I don't think she recognizes it when she sees it. :)

John Sears (john_sears) says:

@Joyce She was created, then raised, by a Mad Scientist, then moved directly into Black Ops.  Her roommate is a necro-technological killing machine (as well as model citizen), and her last family reunion almost resulted in the end of the human race.  I think she might just assume that this is a normal level of danger, and not something requiring courage to confront.

Me, I wonder what Sweetheart would do if she was given some mandatory vacation time.  No life and death struggle, just a sentient superdog with a week to kill.

She might wind up crazier than Moustachio.

Dieter M. (tangerine) says:

When you put it that way, Sweetheart is either about twelve kinds of badass, or she was specifically bred to be very, very relaxed.

 

Nate Cull (natecull) says:

(Tune: "Atom Bomb Baby", The Five Stars)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Spmvg_7ZSgk

 

Got me a Sweetheart, I love her so
Makes me crazier than Moustachio
I don't know how she stays so calm
Even in the face of an atom bomb

Atomb bomb baby, it's just an atom bomb
Says Sweetheart, the superdog from Annex One
Nothing in this office makes her scared
Cause she's genetically engineered

 

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Awwww.
Brian Rogers (billionsix) says:

Seriously, when are Chris and Marcie getting on the Cast Page?

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Manic Monday", The Bangles)

He's gotta cut the right wire, now he's got a choice of three ...
Don't cut the magenta, don't even touch the burgundy!
Carnelian's the one in the middle, yes, there's no doubt!
A guy who knows his shades is the kind that Marcie dreams about!

Chris is such a great guy, courage in the face of doom!
'Caus if he cuts the wrong wire, that box is gonna go kaboom!
Then he'll be vaporized just a tick before you and me ...
And for that millisecond I will cherish his memory!

Stopping an atomic bomb, ah!
He's so cool and calm, ah!
Better than Obama!
He really gelds the llama!
I can't bear the drama, Chris has gotta stop that bomb, ah!

Woof Arf (woofnarf) says:

Y'know, it's pretty amazing that despite all the hyper-shenanigans that occur, no one's died.

Or is the fact that Unity is already dead cover that?

David Harmon (mental_mouse) says:

John Sears: Hmm, that has potential!

Dieter M.:  I think she's just got a really good sense of mission.  It's why she makes a better Lancer than leader. ;-)

Also, remember that she was uplifted from another species -- that makes her a Campbellian alien: "Something that thinks as well as a man, but not like a man."  (Note that that quote predates the feminist retort by some 20 years.)

 

 

Shaenon Garrity (shaenongarrity) says:

I so totally want to do a story with Sweetheart on vacation.
John Goard (darthmiho) says:

Please do it Shaenon. Pwease.

Brian Rogers (billionsix) says:

I love Sweetheart, because she is a really capable leader when she is working and in charge, and kind of a neurotic mess when she isn't.

Andrew Kunz (ampersand888) says:

Next time on Skin Horse, Sweetheart goes to Mexico on vacation, but finds herself in the middle of a top secret operation with Martha and the Humane Society's special agent Bob Barker!

Okay, it could happen. And Martha is from Martha Speaks, one of those PBS kids shows my niece watches in the morning.

Joyce Melton (halfelven) says:

I've decided that I'm going to ship Moustachio and Beni the bomb. Talk about climax!

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

Joyce:  How about Moustachio/Crushinator?

Moustachio having no arms or legs reminds me of the old joke with the punchline, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"

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Shaenon Garrity ||    Forum ·  External Homepage ·  Blog · 

The education bestowed on Shaenon K. Garrity by her parents had been expensive, athletic and prolonged. ... full profile