Well I just heard the news today Amnesiac Ira's gone away Okay he'll still work here part time But the office just won't be the same
He stuck my arm on With just some safety pins It fell off again It wasn't his best work
He stuck my arm on He stuck my arm on
Well I don't know if I'm ready To deal with Commie Whats-his-name I'll take a breath Okay I won't But if I had lungs I totally would
He stuck my arm on With just some safety pins It fell off again But he meant it well
He stuck my arm on Now everything has changed No more Velcro dots No more Sellotape
He stuck my arm on My arm on
If I had just one wish Only one demand It would be your brains But if I had another one I hope that Ira one day Gets his mind unwiped So he can work fulltime
I was thinking, over the weekend, if the cobras had enjoyed their flight with Nick so much that they kept pestering him for more and more rides and refused to get off, he might eventually have lost patience and said, "Enough is enough! I have had it with these mummy-cuddling snakes on this mummy-cuddling plane!"
wait wait wait. you think that a readily detachable bludgeoning weapon is a BAD thing? seriously, unity, i though you had your priorities straight here! safety pins make it an easy--off, easy to re-attach combat option that few have! you should be lauding the man's ingenuity and respect for your no-holds-barred approach to unlife!
486? when did they get that kind of budget? i'm expecting him to be running something along the lines of a Tandy TL/2, tops! it'll have a monitor mounted disruptive teleportation cannon, but it'll be a tandy!
@Fernando Torre: Isn't K one of the Russian cops they run into while they're trying to get back to Annex One in the first storyline with a tranqed-up lion, a hypercaffeinated zombie, and a dog driving the car? He's got a backstory with Unity, that's for sure.
@pokefan: We saw Konstantin in the very start of the strip, when the team was taking Leo to New Jersey. He and his friends pulled them over to ask for a ride, and Unity introduced them as "some of the Black Ops guys that trained me!" I know I won't be able to get links to work right here, but it was in the January 21-26, 2008 week of strips. http://www.webcomicsnation.com/shaenongarrity/skinhorse/series.php?view=archive&chapter=25841.
Readers confused as to Unity's familiarity with Konstantin may consult Konstantin's section on the Wikipedia entry for "Skin Horse". The fact that Konstantin has a section devoted to him amuses me to no end.
Rob (rrreed) says:
@Jeffrey—Who knows? In eighteen more years, it may read like The Simpsons character list.
Tom, the 'Delete' link is there so you can delete the comment of you want to. It only appears next to your posts because you can't delete anyone else's. If I post, I only see it next to mine.
The parenthetical part means, I presume, that a new window (or tab) will open asking if you really want to delete your comment.
Union! We're all union! We're united, undivided, you and me! If there's one sure thing on which we all agree, It's that we stand firm in solidarity!
Human ... and non-human, We don't care what shape or species we might be! We protect ourselves against the bourgeoisie, As we all unite in solidarity!
Now we fight for higher wages, and a health care guarantee! As the contract battle rages, we're in solidarity! How we love negotiating! Bar-gain-ing col-lec-tive-ly! Oh, the management we're hating, 'cause of solidarity!
Stand with me! We stand united, you see! We're AFGE! So sing it with me ...
Union! We're all union! Since we got a raise, we'll sing a phrase or three! Now we'll celebrate with caviar and brie! Standing proud and tall with solidarity!
Do you know what Yakov Smirnoff has been doing these last twenty years? He owns a comedy club in Branson, Missouri of all places. And I see his face plastered everywhere driving in the Ozarks, causing traffic accidents every time.
Guys, you...you're scaring me. And no, I don't mean the filks, or anything like that.
You see, I work for the government. In a job that has occasional similarities to the folks at Skin Horse. Okay, maybe a tad more on the Social Services side, and a little less on the Black Ops. Oh, and our version of the D of I is Employment Services.
Our security folks....well, in some respects, some of them DO remind me of Ira. A number of them really ARE up there in years.
Secondly, I LIVE in Paradise. No, not Paradise Alaska...though right now in Paradise California, it IS threatening snow as I type. No, we don't seem to have an infestation of werewolvery--yet. my dogs DO bear a striking resemblance to Sweetheart, though, on a smaller scale.
Lastly, our department here at work just got done with a really big, ugly, knock-down, drag-out fight between unions.
Jeffrey? Shaenon? Do you secretly have cameras watching me? Aieeeeeeee!!!!
One of the many reasons I recruited Jeff for this project is his background as a Real Actual Civil Servant, which lends Skin Horse an air of verisimilitude. Other useful skills Jeff brings to the table include writing song lyrics, owning dogs and observing their psychology, and living in Wisconsin.
Somebody help me. I've got a plotbunny involving Shaenon giving advice to or mentoring George Beard and Harold Hutchins from Captain Underpants and it won't go away. T_T
(TUNE: "The U.S. Air Force" (aka "Wild Blue Yonder"), Capt. R. M. Crawford)
Onward fax! Printer and coffemaker! Circuits prime, surging with power! To the max! Tripping a circuit breaker, Overtime ... paid by the hour! So relax! If there's a task, we'll take 'er! Working hard ... livin' the dream! For the common good, and brotherhood, Nothing can stop a Union Machine!
Dave Van Domelen (dvandom) says:
Yep. Definitely Artie's fault.
@Myrrdin--Actually, I have done that. Doing so just adds to my reputation around here as someone whose bolts might only be finger-tight. And long ago, I had a calculus professor from Russia who collected Russian jokes you dared not tell in Russia. His absolute favorite was--"A man looks into his bathroom mirror one day and says, out loud, 'You know, at least ONE of us actually works for the KGB...' "
@Jeff and Shaenon--Oh, i don't exactly mind being the secret target of a mind-bending plot--it breaks up the monotony. I will admit, though, certain of your strips HAVE made the rounds here at Ye Local Black Ops Social Services hereabouts--especially the strip with Tip lurching out of the sub-basements on crutches, soaking wet and monologuing about how to handle the denizens therein. Most especially that last line about "Dump it on a supervisor's desk, and hope to God it lands in someone else's caseload." Thank you for that!
Rob (rrreed) says:
Ya know, I just have to wonder what exactly Konstantine did in Russian (Soviet?) Black Ops before his first training session with Unity. He's just so... so... blasé about Skin Horse and Annex One.
@Nate: very will done! You win the Internets today!
(TUNE: "I've Been Working On The Railroad", traditional)
I've been venting at the zombie, All the whole day through! I must cool, composed and calm be; This just will not do! At the Union now I'm swearing! They're as frustrating as can be! Now, hear Unity declaring, "So-li-da-ri-ty!"
Solidarity! Solidarity! Solidarity toni-i-ight! Unionized we'll be! Solidarity! Workers of the world, unite!
All our callers turning the air blue, Call us ev'ry insult they know, oh-oh-oh, Asking us to send a repair crew, Come and fix Moustachio!
We ... will ... twiddle his I/O! We know how to make him go-o-o-o, We ... will ... fix him tomorrow ... Quitting time's an hour ago!
Union workers are supposed to fix Moustachio? I'm not sure that the strip will run that long... Are Shaenon and Jeffrey planning on retirement before they hit 70?
(TUNE: "The Windmills Of Your Mind", Michel Legrand, Alan & Marilyn Bergman)
Broke! Now we can't just crack him open and remove what's bad in there! We must call his local union, get the green light for repair, It's just like the Dead Rights people have been warning Unity, Sewing patterns from Simplicity will void her warranty! Time and time again I told him, tried to warn him that the damn Thirty-year extended warranty was nothing but a scam! Call them on the radio, We must fix Moustachio!
Since when did it become non-fiction? Since the zombie and the ex-werewolf transvestite and the talking dog and the hyperintelligent swarm of bees all... all...
Considering the Skin Horse team's track record with Moustachio to date, I think the Union forbidding them from cracking him open is a sensible precaution.
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