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Smithson Thus Far... ·

John Brown (werbluten) says:

Careful Tigerlilly, that boy is no good for you.

Ysabet Just Ysabet (theysabet) says:

Huh.  But is he going to risk the dress?  I mean, the DRESS.  He wouldn't want them to shoot the dress!

Rob (rrreed) says: Gosh darn it, Tip, you're going to drive Tigerlily sane with your shenanigans!
The Misplaced Mage (misplaced-mage) says:

Free. Free! FREE! FREE!!


Joshua Kronengold (mneme) says:

"Honestly, like I've never been handcuffed to a bed before" (May 4-9, 2009 comic) Tip's a master escape artist!  He doesn't -need- a key to get out of handcuffs!

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Heh.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Squeeze Box", The Who)

Now we got these handcuffs, they're locked on our wrist!
And the PO-lice, they love it if we try to resist!
You just leave it to me,
And I'll get us both free ...
Gettin' outta handcuffs, man, who needs a stinkin' key!

I just take this pin, out from my hair,
And insert it right here and I twist it right there!
And I'm sure you'll agree,
That's a crude simile!
Gettin' outta handcuffs, man, who needs a stinkin' key!

Get it on and off and on and off
And on and off and on and off ...
I'd be happy to see
That you stay and don't flee!
Gettin' outta handcuffs, man, who needs a stinkin' key!

Johnn Reynolds (sleepyjohn) says:

Tigerlily doesn't need a key anyway.  She'd invent a lockpick robot named Finedaddy Wristshiner which would convert the cuffs into a bada** belt buckle.

N B (davecloneseven) says:

Cue 70s-funk remix of MacGyver theme in 3 ... 2 ... 

Rachel Blackman (rainpacket) says:

Wow.  A 70's version of MacGyver would probably be the only way that Richard Dean Anderson could've had even /scarier/ hair in that role.


(Don't get me wrong.  I loved MacGyver as a kid, sitting on the couch with my dad and trying to figure out how Mac would get out of some tight spot.  But watching it again... oh, man, the mullet...)

Tom Powell (top1950) says:

Love Tigerlilly's expression in that last panel.  Also her lines.  She looks like she's suddenly discovered that Tip is crazier than she is!  Great artwork and writing!

Jon Stout (brasswatchman) says: @Ysabet - maybe he figures that they wouldn't *dare* shoot the dress. I mean, look at it!
Andy Wetmore (efogoto) says:

She's Funky Kryptonite!

Adam (10-0-0-1) says: Great, she broke Tip. Where exactly does a transvestite psychologist go to get his superpower fixed?
Dave Estep (cyaegha) says:

 Aaaaand there it is. True love. The inability to get away from each other.

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Aaaaand CUT!

The handcuffs, that is.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Chain Gang", Sam Cooke)

"Hmph!  Huh?
Hmph!  Huh?"
That's the sound of a man
Gettin' outta hand-
That's the sound of a man
Gettin' outta hand-

Only takes a pin like this
To unlock a simple cuff ...
But attached to his nemesis,
He's having, having it rough!
Then you hear him shouting fearfully,
"What have you done to me?!"

That's the sound of a man
Gettin' out of hand-
That's the sound of a man
Gettin' out of hand-

K C (spotweld) says:

Funky Kryptonite needs to be a band name

N B (davecloneseven) says:

Too late:

Terry Smith (wcfan) says:

Life imitates art.

Owl Who says South (owlsayssouth) says:

not enough vespine gas.

Vlad Taltos (flyingfish) says:

Okay, ultimate test. Can he still change clothes?

Corgi (corgi) says:

Oh my God.  It's a metaphor. [facepalms]

Rob (rrreed) says: Looks like Unity's opened a side business. Since I don't want to be accused of spamming, I'll just suggest that one search for a certain "classified" substance of Unity's (leave out the "non-", though) on a web site whose name rhymes with "Frink Meek".
W o o d (wood) says:

It's like... White mama, Black mama !

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Aiiii...
Dave Estep (cyaegha) says:

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Greg Evigan! Oh, wait. whoops....

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Tonight's The Night", Rod Stewart)

Don't touch me!  Get away!
Don't want no Bear, want no B.J.!
Make me panic!  Make me say damn!
I don't even know who I am!

I don't know what's going down!
Since we stole this Mainbocher gown!
I've lost my secret fire!
Tigerlily, you're a mojo vampire!

My Kryptonite!
It's totally not right!
Since I saw you, girl,
It seems I lost my ... superpower!

Johnn Reynolds (sleepyjohn) says:

No, Tip, you'll know what you've lost when you decide to slip into orange velveteen sweat pants, a tube top, and Crocs.

Josh Shepherd (bergerjacques) says:

@ Wood - Dang, you beat me to it. "Black Momma, White Momma" indeed. Happy 60th Birthday, Pam Grier.

vicka corey (drbrain) says:

boy, she doesn't like him much, does she?

not that she has reason to....

Nate Cull (natecull) says:

(Tune: "Hound Dog", Elvis Presley)

I just really like bullhorns
And shoutin' all the time!
I just really like bullhorns
And shoutin' all the time!
Well I'm chattin' with the fugitives
But that's no fault of mine

Clearly this is mad science!
I've got backup on the way!
Clearly this is mad science!
I've got backup on the way!
Skin Horse is in chaos
And it's just another day

Do you need a narrator?
Cause I can shout in capitals!
Do you need a narrator?
Cause I can shout in capitals!
I can catch you up on storylines
From the other panels

See I just really like bullhorns
And shoutin' all the time!
Yeah I just really like bullhorns
And shoutin' all the time!
So I'm chattin' with the fugitives
But that's no fault of mine

Pete Bleackley (petethemadscientist) says:

Re yestereday's comic.

If Dr Lee is right, and Tip's powers are a matter of letting women project their fantasies onto him, then this explains what's happening to him at the moment. Tigerlilies fantasies involve dismepowering white men, especially those who work for the government. Tip's powers are working against themselves.

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: *snicker*
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "I Want Candy", The Strangeloves)

I know you're in there, Tigerlily!
Your mad science is really silly!
To chat with you as I desire,
Just one thing that I require ...

I like bullhorns!  I like bullhorns!

Loud as a racecar's engine revvin' ...
Turn the volume up to eleven!
Doctor Jones, you make me irate!
So I'll shout 'til your ears vibrate!

I like bullhorns!  I like bullhorns!

Only talk quiet when I'm inside!
I like my voice when it's amplified!
Just one thing gives me the blues ...
I still can't out-shout Fox News!

I like bullhorns!  I like bullhorns!
I like bullhorns!  I like bullhorns!

Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says:

Mmmm...  chatting with the fugitives...

Diane Castle (deecee) says:

'Chatting with the fugitivies'.  Is that what they're calling it these days?

Drew (pseudowolf) says:

"Chatting With The Fugitives" is what I'm going to name my band.

Tom Powell (top1950) says:

That 'would' be a cool name for a band.

Or a T-shirt!

Rachel Blackman (rainpacket) says:

Oh, dear.  She has a madgirl font... but it's funkadelic.  (Or is that funkalicious?  I always confuse the two.)

John Campbell (jcampbel) says:

Don't be such a square, Tip. Any situation that involves being chained to a hot madgirl speaking in that font automatically includes at least a little win.

Rob (rrreed) says:

“No… wire… hangers. What’s wire hangers doing in this closet when I told you: no wire hangers EVER!
So It Begins (soitbegins) says: Uh-oh.
Nate Cull (natecull) says:

(Tune: "Goldfinger", sung by Shirley Bassey)

Says the chick, the chick with MacGyver's touch
To hack neat stuff, from a boat anchor!
She wants you to help her construct a droid
Tulsa'll be destroyed!

A screwdriver she waves in the air
And her eyes have that soft-focus flare
For a funkadelic clockpunky sister
Can build Tesla death
Right out of

Golden boy, don't give her a paperclip
Or she'll build a starship!

Reunite Jefferson Starship!
With a robotic Grace Slick!
It'll make you feel sick!
"We Built This City" sick!
Star Wars Holiday Special sick!
So don't let her do her trick!
Don't even give her a Tic-

Pete Bleackley (petethemadscientist) says:

Hmm, Tigerlilly's 70's obsession isn't confined to Disco. The word "Yes" in that font is definitely Prog Rock.

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

(TUNE: "Titwillow", Gilbert & Sullivan)

In Doc Wilkin's apartment, there's rows upon rows
Of hangers, coathangers, coathangers!
And he uses them simply to hang up his clothes
With hangers, coathangers, coathangers!
There's the padded type used for spaghetti-strap dress,
And the cheap plastic ones came from Wal-Mart, I guess,
And the back of the closet's a big tangled mess
Of hangers, coathangers, coathangers!

Now Doc Englebright warns she'll be dishing out pain;
Oh, dang her!  Oh, dang her!  Oh, dang her!
But beware, Tigerlily's been driven insane
With anger!  With anger!  With anger!
With a burst of mad genius to drive her, she's thrilled!
And with cleverness just like MacGuyver, she's skilled!
For with only a simple screwdriver, she'll build
With hangers, coathangers, coathangers!

Jon W. (kd7sov) says:

... I don't know how to classify this on the Madness Place scale. The font is too severe for Stage 1, but the balloons aren't distorted, so it's not Stage 2.

Unless... maybe the flowers and stars are Tigerlily's specific distortion. She's not a faux-early-twentieth-century European Spark, after all, so why should she follow the same conventions?

All right, stage 2 it is.

Andrew Kunz (ampersand888) says:

Screw the Madness Scale, where does using hundreds of coat hangers to formulate an escape rank on the MacGyver scale?

Rob (rrreed) says: @Andrew — Depends on whether they're wire or plastic coat hangers. Plastic is more common these days (unless you've been saving those wire hangers from the dry cleaners for forever), but is harder to work with than wire.
Drew (pseudowolf) says:

Hmm, Tigerlilly's 70's obsession isn't confined to Disco. The word "Yes" in that font is definitely Prog Rock.

Oh, dear. I hope Tip doesn't get stuck in a Floyd Hole.

A David Merritt (adm) says:

I think it's safe to say that a cloths horse like Tip would only have  wooden hangers.

M Lowe-Hentges (annechen67) says:

Tip would only have wooden or satin-covered padded clotheshangers. I hope Dr Jones can hang with that.

Nate Cull (natecull) says:

We must all hang together, or assuredly we will all hang separately.

Dave Van Domelen (dvandom) says: Quantum Spring Theory.
Corgi (corgi) says:

They're the hangers his drycleaning comes back on; he hasn't taken this batch back for recycling yet, after putting the clothes on proper hangers.

Justin Kane (avatarjk137) says:

That woman's hair is full of talent.

Owl Who says South (owlsayssouth) says:

Dr J. lol.

the blonde psychologist falls for the crazy person and helps them escape.

oh tip, you might be jumping comics now. dont let her convince you to get dressed up as her sidekick, or in anything that resembles a harlequinn outfit.

So It Begins (soitbegins) says: @Owl Who Says South: Are you kidding? Now that you've mentioned it, that's exactly what we need to have happen!
Owl Who says South (owlsayssouth) says:

Aye. But... Who shall be Crashing in through the window to stop the atempt to fill the water supply with an overdose of Funk?

SquareMan to the rescue.

Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says:

"SquareMan" - I like that.

Or could could be "The Man Man", or even "TheMan" (accent on the first syllable, not the second.)

Nate Cull (natecull) says:

Shouldn't they be very SMALL springs?

Johnn Reynolds (sleepyjohn) says:

"I'm gonna rip reality a new wormhole!"

Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:

Second panel:  if Tigerlily has to resort to a Glasses Pull, things are getting SERIOUS.

(TUNE: "My Favorite Things", Rogers and Hammerstein)

Here's Doctor Englebright making me angry!
So I will make a device that's coat-hanger-y!
Genius can generate jury-rigged things,
Watch as I make quantum wormholes with springs!

Using old hangers and some random junk now,
Make a machine that is powered by funk now!
Caught in my madness, the Universe sings!
Watch as I make quantum wormholes with springs!

If they're quantum,
Then I want 'em!
They can help our cause!
If we can escape using wormholes from springs,
We just might wind up ...
In Oz!

Timothy Tylor (timtylor) says:

Joan Crawford tried a similar wormhole project for school science fair. The traumatising results left her with a lifelong neurosis against wire hangers.

Diane Castle (deecee) says:

@eddurd: at least, when Tigerlily did her glasses pull, we didn't have Roger Daltery screaming YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!!

otrstf (otrstf) says:

Well, coathangers are only partially in this universe in the best of times (witness how they appear and randomly disapear from your closet); they would seem to already have an affinity for wormholes.  Socks might be a better choice, since one sock always remains behind in this dimension while the other travels.

Sam Daniel (samhdaniel) says:

Eddurd: another excellent effort!

This guy I know (thisguy) says:

Okay, I've been resisting the urge to post here for a very long time, but I just read Nick's latest livejournal entry and my will has snapped. It may be almost a week late, but...

Was that really a Lizard Music reference? Please excuse me for a moment while I squee in an undignified manner.

That was one of my favorite books ever. (I've reread it so often that my copy has been held together with a rubber band for several years now--I'm considering laminating the covers so they don't disintegrate completely.) With that and actually *playing* Interstellar Pig, I have to say Nick is made of win. (Oh, I suppose being a talky helicopter is cool too. But let's stick to the important stuff!)

That is all for now. I think I'll go back into hiding again. (Seriously though, this is an awesome comic. I've only waited until now to say it because I don't like registering for things. But now that I'm here, it had to be said. Keep up the great work!)

Rob (rrreed) says: One question: how much winding is this Wind-Up Quantum Wormhole Generator going to need, anyway? Sure, it may work (Not work? Inconceivable!), but if it takes 87¾ days to wind up it's not exactly a practical escape route.
Dave Corbett (mr_dave) says:

@RRRob: There's a 13.28176% chance that it's already wound.

Austin Buelt (mearn4d10) says:

Give me a large enough spring and somewhere to wind it and I'll Move the Universe?

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The education bestowed on Shaenon K. Garrity by her parents had been expensive, athletic and prolonged. ... full profile