Kay Gilbert (kaygilbert) says:
I like Ed's holiday-theme idea, so here's a filk of "O little town of Bethlehem" Infectious sophont of terror and unliving life
Viktor Dosk (hugin) says:
Revenant Ubermensch yes, Grim no. Phoebe doesn't realize what she's dealing with here, and by the time she does, Unity will have a new kneecap.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:
(TUNE: "It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas", Meredith Willson)
David Harmon (mental_mouse) says:
Clearly Unity hasn't had a chance to show off her new spare parts! And why shouldn't the monsters have fun together? I wonder if this interfering CIA agent is what eventually gets the swamp... angry.
Sophia Luden (ladyasphodel) says:
Wait. Infectious? Is that why Unity's acting funny?
Andrew Kunz (ampersand888) says:
Unity isn't infectious. iCarly is infectious.
Michael Brewer (wusemajor) says:
I'm curious if it actually is a Class A Threat to Humanity or not. I mean, technically, Unity probably also fits into that category, but they're not after her. What's so dangerous about the Swamp?
Andrew Kunz (ampersand888) says:
Tip's superpower strikes again! Even when she go in not wanting to do Tip, she ends up wanting to do Tip. That has to be worth at least a Class D Threat to Humanity.
Rob (rrreed) says:
Mind you, the "Class A Threat to Humanity" could be Gavotte. Just sayin'…
Paul K (mnementh) says:
@ wusemajor - You mean aside from a bazillion gators, a bazillion poisonous OTHER reptiles, a bazillion kinds of poisonous bugs and plants and the Deliverance Banjo Boy? mnem Oh... and don't forget the psychic residue of generations of faith so powerful it successfully combined Hatian-born Voodo with Catholicism...
Kirt Dankmyer (xiombarg) says:
@wusemajor And remember, isn't this in essence a flashback? Unity woke up in the swamp, right? We know it's dangerous, after all. Tho, admittedly, "how" it's dangerous is still a question.
M. Alan Thomas II (crazydreamer) says:
A Threat to Humans, yes. A Threat to Humanity, I'm a little less certain about; it depends on just how "infectious" this thing is. I mean, if it's confined to the swamp, then that's not exactly safe even when it's not intelligent, and we're smart enough to keep out either way.
Pandora Caitiff (pandora_c) says:
@rrreed - Class "B" surely? ;-)
Rob (rrreed) says:
:: rimshot ::
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:
(TUNE: "I'll Be Home For Christmas", Kim Gannon and Walter Kent)
Johnn Reynolds (sleepyjohn) says:
You're hot, so Tip will do you. You're also warm, so Unity will do your brains.
John Campbell (jcampbel) says:
I suspect "Central" is Anasigma Central. Remember, the guys who vaporized Dr. Lee's underwear drawer?
And you'd think they'd know better than to send hot women after Tip. It's like trying to defeat Aquaman with Summon Bigger Fish.
Diane Castle (deecee) says:
I'm more concerned about the Class AAA threat to humanity posed by battery spam.
Dieter M. (tangerine) says:
This is NOT the second to last place I'd expect to see a Darths & Droids reference.
So: Who is the Class A Threat to Humanity? I'm going to say it's Sir Not-Appeared-Yet-In-This-Story.
Tom Powell (top1950) says:
@tangerine: He's my favorite!
Michael Brewer (wusemajor) says:
It's worth noting that I admit the possibility that the Swamp is very dangerous. I just think that we've seen little to no reason to regard it as being more dangerous to human life as a whole than, say, any other member of the cast. That said, thinking about it, I do seem to recall some mentions of wish granting powers.
Viktor Dosk (hugin) says:
She had sex with her target, never saw the swamp, then packed up her surveillance equipment and left. Sounds like Skin Horse was successful and she wasn't to me. Pretty damn crack team.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:
(TUNE: "It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year", Eddie Pola and George Wyle)
Glenn Gorsuch (glenn) says:
Oh, Ed! That was...words fail me. Well, except that I'm wondering HOW I'm supposed to explain the odd little smile to my family that I'll have when the CD player is going through the Christmas music.
Ysabet Just Ysabet (theysabet) says:
Shame she'll miss the muffalettas (hur hur hur.)
Andrew Kunz (ampersand888) says:
I didn't think anyone could ruin Andy William's version of The Most Wonderful Time. (Well, other than Branson. I live near the area. It's like a redneck version of Dagobah.) Clearly, Ed is the master.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:
If I'm the Master, does that make Shaenon the Doctor? (OK, now I'm picturing Shaenon as the fourth Doctor, and Andrew as Leela ...)
John Breckenridge (jbrecken) says:
(TUNE: "O Christmas Tree") O U-ni-ty, O U-ni-ty, Don't care 'bout Phoebe planting bugs, O U-ni-ty, O U-ni-ty,
Brandon Gorley (bowtothebard) says:
Oddly, Tip and Phoebe are about the least crack pairing you could make with the Skin Horse cast.
Michael Brewer (wusemajor) says:
So, she works for Anasigma then.
.....Also, since when was having made Unity ever a good thing?
Paul Lenoue (palenoue) says:
Remember this important lesson, children: when the zombie apocalypse occurs, distract the hungry undead with lolcats and loldogs.
Kay Gilbert (kaygilbert) says:
tune: The Hallelujah Chorus from The Messiah (George Frideric Handel, 1742)
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:
@Kay: very nicely done! The only nit I'd pick is that "Hallelujah" is from the later part of Messiah, which is about Easter instead of Christmas. Maybe you could do something for Unity along the lines of "For Unto Us a Child is Built." (TUNE: "Santa Baby", Javits, Springer, & Ebb)
Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says:
SQUIRREL!!!
Mason Kramer (masonk) says:
Ed: Perhaps so, but it's also an annual tradition for the chorus at Christmastime. Every year our local churches (13 of them) put on a concert where each choir contributes, and at the end we let our powers combine and belt that thing out.
Rachel S. (masamage) says:
And Joy to the World is supposed to be about the Second Coming. But yeah, tradition. :) Nice work, guys!
Mike Kozar (mikekozar) says:
@Ed: That's gonna be stuck in my head. :) well done!
Kay Gilbert (kaygilbert) says:
Ed, as an atheist, I'm kind of like the Hallelujah Chorus: I show up to celebrate Christmas, whether or not I belong there. But I haven't spent all those years at sing-along Messiahs for nothing, so here's "For unto us a child is born" I hate my job, I'm gonna quit
Diane Castle (deecee) says:
@Kay: Wow! Nice work! (Both of them.) And for those who do not know what ADOS is, I recommend you go to TV Tropes and look up 'Attention Deficit Ooh Shiny'.
Mason Kramer (masonk) says:
Ahhhh! Deecee, you should never recommend TV Tropes! Especially when AD is involved! I'll lose my whole--I mean, some people will lose their whole afternoon!
Cesario VIola (cesarioviola) says:
So does this mean I should go add Phoebe to the teeny people thing?
Mason Kramer (masonk) says:
I hate it when that happens.
Rob (rrreed) says:
You'd think he'd have learned to strap them down by now…
woozy (woozy) says:
>>I hate it when that happens. Well, I've been lucky. It hasn't happened to me very often at all.
M. Alan Thomas II (crazydreamer) says:
Ah, now we get to the "infectious" part, I take it?
Kirt Dankmyer (xiombarg) says:
So, this dude's life is a cheerier version of Cemetery Man.
Andrew Kunz (ampersand888) says:
If this weren't Christmas week I could totally see a filk of Rocket Man here. And we've probably already used Rocket Man. (Seriously, are we running out of music to filk yet?)
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:
@Andrew: Yes, in fact I used "Rocket Man" three times in the space of about six weeks. That was when I started keeping track of what songs I've used, and when. I still have a few dozen tunes in the "not used yet" file. Remember the start of "A Charlie Brown Christmas", when the kids are all skating and singing? Here you go, then ... (TUNE: "Christmastime Is Here", Vince Guaraldi)
Sam Daniel (samhdaniel) says:
Another new friend for Unity?
woozy (woozy) says:
So the question is, does Remy's "again" refer to many of the dead getting up and stomping about, or just that Mrs. May keeps getting up and stomping about. Now I expect to see the fox hat move and talk before the new year! And turning into a zombie fox hat DOES NOT COUNT! BRING BACK THE FOX!
Dieter M. (tangerine) says:
Okay, so maybe the swamp dealy-o is, indeed, a Class AAA Threat to Humanity. Who'd have thunk it?
woozy (woozy) says:
Awww, Unity got her Christmas wish!
Paul K (mnementh) says:
Dead. And lo-oving it. mnem Life is just a state of denial...
Euel Ball (euel) says:
We are going to see hot zombie versus zombie action. Then again, even though she's made up of other people's body parts, Unity's more alive than most breathing people...
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:
(TUNE: "White Christmas", Irving Berlin)
John Sears (john_sears) says:
Hmm. This new turn of events is quite disturbing from a Zombie Rights perspective. The last thing we need is Intra-community conflict.
Dave Estep (cyaegha) says:
Oh, Remy... such potential for true horror undone by slow zombies.
Ysabet Just Ysabet (theysabet) says:
Huh; zombies... and not the in-the-glass-with-a-straw variety. Well, it IS New Orleans; it was bound to happen sooner or later.
woozy (woozy) says:
Filking it hard. I thought about doing a filk to Tom Lehrer's christmas song an got: Unity got a call from Remy That one verse took me a long time and then I couldn't get any further. When it comes to filking, I am way out of my depth.
Tom Powell (top1950) says:
Um, Unity, I think you'd better delve into that call just a little deeper. I realize you're in an unusually cheerful mood, but I believe your boy caller just might be needing some help!
Tom Powell (top1950) says:
PS: Shaenon & Jeffery: Thanks for giving us a new toon, even on "Christmas Day." Talk about going above and beyond! You guys RULE!
Rachel Blackman (rainpacket) says:
Zombies Rise (To the tune of "Jingle Bells")
Lurching through the rooms, Seeking living brains, Perhaps you want to work Somewhere with less remains? You'll try to call for help, But your zombie's got no clue. So now the mortuary's ours, And our attention is on you! Oh! Zombie march! Zombie march! See us lurch and grunt! While Gary there eats your cellphone, We'll begin our hunt, oh! Zombie march! Zombie march! New Orleans will soon fall, And all because that zombie friend of yours mis-inter-pret-ed your call!
...MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY!
John Sears (john_sears) says:
Now now everyone. This is New Orleans, there's no reason to believe that Zombies there would eat brains. (Which is mostly a harmful stereotype from a 1985 movie anyway.)
Derek Burrow (derekthebard) says:
Its not like they've filed any memos yet to that effect, at least.
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